Grief in the Womb With Julia Jeffress Sadler

Grief in the Womb With Julia Jeffress Sadler

She'd known God her whole life, but her faith was put to the test when she lost her first child to miscarriage. And her second. And her third. Julia Jeffress Sadler, daughter of First Baptist Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress, shares her remarkable story about the spiritual warfare behind carrying a child and how praying big things gets big results.

24 Minutes • a month ago

Episode Notes

Charisma News

Special Series: Grief in the Womb

Guest: Julia Jeffress Sadler

She'd known God her whole life, but her faith was put to the test when she lost her first child to miscarriage. And her second. And her third.

Julia Jeffress Sadler, daughter of First Baptist Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress, shares her remarkable story about the spiritual warfare behind carrying a child and how praying big things gets big results.

Introduction

Welcome to the Charisma News podcast. I'm your host Jessilyn Lancaster. Joining me today is Julia Jeffress Sadler. You may recognize her from TLC’s “Rattled,” but she's here to share her miraculous infertility story with our podcast series “Grief in the Womb.” She'd known God her whole life, but her faith was put to the test when she lost her first child to miscarriage, and then her second, and then her third. The daughter of First Baptist Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress, Julia will share her remarkable story about the spiritual warfare behind carrying a child and how praying big things gets big results. Julia has quite a miraculous story as she worked to conceive her three beautiful babies. For people who may not be familiar with your story or even with your family, Julia, tell us a little bit about who you are.

 

·         Julia’s book: Pray Big Things: The Surprising Life God Has for You When You’re Bold Enough to Ask

 

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I'm Julia Jeffress Sadler, and I am the girls’ minister at First Baptist Dallas in Texas and I married my junior high sweetheart, Ryan, and we have been running the student ministry at our church for the past 10 years. I'm also a licensed professional counselor.

Jessilyn Lancaster: We are here today to talk about “Grief in the Womb,” which sounds very sad to go from like such a happy note to kind of a little bit of a struggle. Tell us a little bit about your story and why you're here today.

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I know it's hard to talk about these topics, but it's always so exciting whenever you get to talk about the good things that come from them and what God is showing you. Ryan and I were married for seven years, and we never tried to have kids. We had 300 teenagers that we were responsible for and that was good enough. We're trying to finish our degrees and, and we're just content with waiting. Then we actually ended up at a youth ministry conference and everybody there was on their like, seventh kid, and we're like, OK, maybe it's time. I mean, obviously, I'm exaggerating, but most people had children. So, we thought maybe we should probably start tying. I had just finished 10 years to get my license for counseling, and it just seemed like the right time. So, we just got pregnant immediately. I remember thinking, wow, that was really easy. And we're excited. Then a few weeks later, I actually miscarried on a night where I had 100 teenage girls in my backyard. I was ironically teaching and about how God had a purpose for them in their specific season and their specific age that wasn't contingent on anything in the future. And so obviously, that was super symbolic, losing our first child while I'm sitting there teaching 100 girls about how God has a purpose for them today. So, that was, that was the first miscarriage and it was sad. We were very saddened by it and but at the same time, I had a lot of women reach out, a lot of friends who said, I know this is sad, but it's really normal. A lot of people experience that with their first pregnancy. So, even though we were sad, we weren't completely hopeless.

So, a few months later, we tried again, got pregnant immediately. I remember kind of being annoyed with a few people, I told that they weren't more excited. But they were they're just fearful. They're like, OK, you've already done all right, and this once and miscarried. That time, we're actually on vacation. I was having to go to this little clinic every three days as we slowly lost the baby. And then on the very last day when we're about to fly home, I miscarried on an airplane. Then, as soon as we got home, church season kind of follows school and the school calendar, and so we've got back in August, and that was just time to go full throttle into the fall and into working. So, I was pretty devastated by the second miscarriage, but I just decided … you know what, I had a strong faith, I had a strong basis. I was like, even though this is happening, I know God has a plan for me, it's OK. So, I just kind of kept going and kind of worked just super hard. Then by that February we got pregnant again, and then I actually miscarried on a weekend where I was speaking in two different states, one on a Christian view of anxiety and depression. Then the next day was on, ironically, why God allows suffering. I shared that we were losing children while having these spiritual milestones, and because it was impossible to miss the fact that God was still trying to do something, even while there is such a temptation to become discouraged and such a temptation to feel hopeless.

I remember just really feeling like, and you know it can sound kind of melodramatic, but it's what the Bible teaches that there really is spiritual warfare. I just felt like there were two forces really fighting for our faith and our family and our future. It almost became like not, of course, laughable, but so ironic having a miscarriage while you're teaching my God allow suffering. And I remember just thinking, you know what? I'm just not going to give up because I believe that God is good and that He's doing something and I'm going to see what happens. So, that was just the stance I took. I'm not going to give up, I'm not going to recount or wonder where that is. I'm just going to believe what I know to be true and see what happens.

Jessilyn Lancaster: I love it. Now, how did you go from that thought process to your triplets?

 

·         James 4:2: You lust and do not have, so you kill. You desire to have and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have, because you do not ask” (MEV).

 

Julia Jeffress Sadler: So what happened in the midst of all those miscarriages was Ryan and I decided that we took very seriously James 4:2, you have not because you ask not. For whatever reason, that's the verse God gave us. So, we just decided we were not going to miss out on anything because we didn't take the time to ask God for it. So, we would pray multiple times a day. We kind of joked that, for evangelical and Baptists, we can be super charismatic during this. We just prayed all day long and we prayed for three children and for multiples and Ephesians 3:20, for God to do more than anything can you imagine. We just claimed that scripture. Of course, we said, God, you can do whatever you want to do. But if you're going to do something different, you need to take this desire away because with our hearts, we want three children and multiples and we want to see you do more than anything we can imagine. So, during that time, and it's recommended if you’ve had three miscarriages that something's going on with you medically. So, that was the recommended time to go to an infertility specialist.

 

·         Ephesians 3:20: Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all that we ask or imagine, according to the power that works in us, …” (MEV).

 

We did and, and I remember she said … she was looking at my paperwork and she said, within a few months you're going to be pregnant and stay pregnant. I remember just thinking, OK, I'll take that. Of course, she didn’t know that for sure, but we just started praying constantly. I love the persistent widow in the Bible. I always tell people I'm talking to that she’s my favorite character in the Bible. He gives us the scriptural authority to be annoying. I was like, hey, it's me. I'm here again. I want multiples. I want the children. I need to see you work. If you're not going to do this, you need to take this desire away from me. And that can sound bossy, but all we're doing was claiming scripture. We're saying, amen. You said this. So, we need to see you do it. We took a very low dose of medication, prayed for muliples, and whenever we went into the doctor's office, the doctor was shocked. She did the ultrasound and then she stopped and goes, I don't want to scare you … Ryan is still upset with her for starting that sentence that way because he was like, what, what? I knew I was twins. She said I don't want to scare you, but there's three babies in there. We just started cheering like we had won the Olympics. We were so excited. And then because, overnight, we had been thrust into the subculture of infertility and miscarriage and Christians struggling and non-Christians struggling with this and it becoming such a faith or doctor or medical issue … anyway, all that to say is all of a sudden our eyes have been opened to the whole group that was struggling in this way. And so Ryan and I decided, you know what, we're on a roll let's start praying for a TV show because we want people to hear this story. It’s important for people to hear the amazing things that God does. It gives people hope. And, so we did. We just started praying God, and it seems weird, but we just said, please give us a TV show so that we can share this story. People need to hear it. People need to hear that God still answers big prayers. So, we didn't reach out to anybody. We just kept praying and one day Ryan came in my office and said, honey, are you still praying for that TV show? And I said, no, like, I'm just trying to keep you know the three babies that are in me. He goes, I think we still need to pray and that God allows that to happen. But we did, we prayed together and said God, we want to share our story. So, we just kind of prayed one last time and then the next day TLC reached out to us without us doing anything. That was incredible.

Jessilyn Lancaster: Now, how long were you guys through the infertility process from the first miscarriage to when you were able to conceive your triplets? And how old are the babies now?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I think it was about a year process. They are 16 months. It's confusing because they were born a month premature.

Jessilyn Lancaster: And what are their names?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: It’s Blair, Blake and Barrett.

Jessilyn Lancaster: And they are super adorable. You guys should check out “Rattled” if you haven't seen an episode already. Talk to me a little bit about your faith in this process. I know you mentioned the power of prayer, what would you say to the woman who is like, I've prayed for this for 10 years and nothing's happening what do I do?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I actually am doing a class right now and it’s called In Due Time. It's for couples that are in that season. I'm teaching it online and at our church. And so that's, of course, kind of what you have to talk about. If you're like, well, we just prayed for it and it happened. I think you just can't forget that there is a huge time that we didn't have answers and then we didn't know what was going to happen. I would say one, don't let Satan steal the season. There's a purpose right now, even if all we want to do is get pregnant. It’s really with the things that are good, like wanting to be married, wanting to be pregnant, wanting these things. Even though they're good, they can really distract us from the purpose God has for us today. In our absolute worst year, personally, when we kept having those miscarriages … and side note, something I didn't know, was every time you get pregnant, even if you miscarry, those hormones are still there as if you've given birth. So, that is not really information that is mass shared, and people need to know that. So, it's like I was pregnant three times and then losing this one and then getting them back. Our worst year personally, our absolutely worst year, was our best year in ministry without a doubt, to date. So, even though we had three miscarriages and all the traumas and all the devastation, we started actually a huge emphasis of our 300 teenagers called Tell the World, and it was encouraging them to use their everyday conversations and opportunities to witness. We actually saw teenagers witness to 130 people in downtown Dallas and we saw people getting saved. We had 12 teens that were witnessing the Muslims. I mean, it was incredible and the kids still talk about it. So, just remember, all that to say is even though we really want to get pregnant or want to be married, or whatever the future dream is … our struggles, even though they surprise us, they don't surprise God. So, He has a plan right now. We can't let Satan steal this season because, while we're just going through Instagram, or being jealous of someone else who is pregnant, someone right next to us at Target that is just waiting for someone to tell them how to become a Christian.

 

Connect with Julia Jeffress Sadler

·         Juliajsadler.com

·         On Facebook

·         Twitter

·         On Instagram

 

Episode Notes

Charisma News

Special Series: Grief in the Womb

Guest: Julia Jeffress Sadler

She'd known God her whole life, but her faith was put to the test when she lost her first child to miscarriage. And her second. And her third.

Julia Jeffress Sadler, daughter of First Baptist Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress, shares her remarkable story about the spiritual warfare behind carrying a child and how praying big things gets big results.

Introduction

Welcome to the Charisma News podcast. I'm your host Jessilyn Lancaster. Joining me today is Julia Jeffress Sadler. You may recognize her from TLC’s “Rattled,” but she's here to share her miraculous infertility story with our podcast series “Grief in the Womb.” She'd known God her whole life, but her faith was put to the test when she lost her first child to miscarriage, and then her second, and then her third. The daughter of First Baptist Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress, Julia will share her remarkable story about the spiritual warfare behind carrying a child and how praying big things gets big results. Julia has quite a miraculous story as she worked to conceive her three beautiful babies. For people who may not be familiar with your story or even with your family, Julia, tell us a little bit about who you are.

 

·         Julia’s book: Pray Big Things: The Surprising Life God Has for You When You’re Bold Enough to Ask

 

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I'm Julia Jeffress Sadler, and I am the girls’ minister at First Baptist Dallas in Texas and I married my junior high sweetheart, Ryan, and we have been running the student ministry at our church for the past 10 years. I'm also a licensed professional counselor.

Jessilyn Lancaster: We are here today to talk about “Grief in the Womb,” which sounds very sad to go from like such a happy note to kind of a little bit of a struggle. Tell us a little bit about your story and why you're here today.

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I know it's hard to talk about these topics, but it's always so exciting whenever you get to talk about the good things that come from them and what God is showing you. Ryan and I were married for seven years, and we never tried to have kids. We had 300 teenagers that we were responsible for and that was good enough. We're trying to finish our degrees and, and we're just content with waiting. Then we actually ended up at a youth ministry conference and everybody there was on their like, seventh kid, and we're like, OK, maybe it's time. I mean, obviously, I'm exaggerating, but most people had children. So, we thought maybe we should probably start tying. I had just finished 10 years to get my license for counseling, and it just seemed like the right time. So, we just got pregnant immediately. I remember thinking, wow, that was really easy. And we're excited. Then a few weeks later, I actually miscarried on a night where I had 100 teenage girls in my backyard. I was ironically teaching and about how God had a purpose for them in their specific season and their specific age that wasn't contingent on anything in the future. And so obviously, that was super symbolic, losing our first child while I'm sitting there teaching 100 girls about how God has a purpose for them today. So, that was, that was the first miscarriage and it was sad. We were very saddened by it and but at the same time, I had a lot of women reach out, a lot of friends who said, I know this is sad, but it's really normal. A lot of people experience that with their first pregnancy. So, even though we were sad, we weren't completely hopeless.

So, a few months later, we tried again, got pregnant immediately. I remember kind of being annoyed with a few people, I told that they weren't more excited. But they were they're just fearful. They're like, OK, you've already done all right, and this once and miscarried. That time, we're actually on vacation. I was having to go to this little clinic every three days as we slowly lost the baby. And then on the very last day when we're about to fly home, I miscarried on an airplane. Then, as soon as we got home, church season kind of follows school and the school calendar, and so we've got back in August, and that was just time to go full throttle into the fall and into working. So, I was pretty devastated by the second miscarriage, but I just decided … you know what, I had a strong faith, I had a strong basis. I was like, even though this is happening, I know God has a plan for me, it's OK. So, I just kind of kept going and kind of worked just super hard. Then by that February we got pregnant again, and then I actually miscarried on a weekend where I was speaking in two different states, one on a Christian view of anxiety and depression. Then the next day was on, ironically, why God allows suffering. I shared that we were losing children while having these spiritual milestones, and because it was impossible to miss the fact that God was still trying to do something, even while there is such a temptation to become discouraged and such a temptation to feel hopeless.

I remember just really feeling like, and you know it can sound kind of melodramatic, but it's what the Bible teaches that there really is spiritual warfare. I just felt like there were two forces really fighting for our faith and our family and our future. It almost became like not, of course, laughable, but so ironic having a miscarriage while you're teaching my God allow suffering. And I remember just thinking, you know what? I'm just not going to give up because I believe that God is good and that He's doing something and I'm going to see what happens. So, that was just the stance I took. I'm not going to give up, I'm not going to recount or wonder where that is. I'm just going to believe what I know to be true and see what happens.

Jessilyn Lancaster: I love it. Now, how did you go from that thought process to your triplets?

 

·         James 4:2: You lust and do not have, so you kill. You desire to have and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have, because you do not ask” (MEV).

 

Julia Jeffress Sadler: So what happened in the midst of all those miscarriages was Ryan and I decided that we took very seriously James 4:2, you have not because you ask not. For whatever reason, that's the verse God gave us. So, we just decided we were not going to miss out on anything because we didn't take the time to ask God for it. So, we would pray multiple times a day. We kind of joked that, for evangelical and Baptists, we can be super charismatic during this. We just prayed all day long and we prayed for three children and for multiples and Ephesians 3:20, for God to do more than anything can you imagine. We just claimed that scripture. Of course, we said, God, you can do whatever you want to do. But if you're going to do something different, you need to take this desire away because with our hearts, we want three children and multiples and we want to see you do more than anything we can imagine. So, during that time, and it's recommended if you’ve had three miscarriages that something's going on with you medically. So, that was the recommended time to go to an infertility specialist.

 

·         Ephesians 3:20: Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all that we ask or imagine, according to the power that works in us, …” (MEV).

 

We did and, and I remember she said … she was looking at my paperwork and she said, within a few months you're going to be pregnant and stay pregnant. I remember just thinking, OK, I'll take that. Of course, she didn’t know that for sure, but we just started praying constantly. I love the persistent widow in the Bible. I always tell people I'm talking to that she’s my favorite character in the Bible. He gives us the scriptural authority to be annoying. I was like, hey, it's me. I'm here again. I want multiples. I want the children. I need to see you work. If you're not going to do this, you need to take this desire away from me. And that can sound bossy, but all we're doing was claiming scripture. We're saying, amen. You said this. So, we need to see you do it. We took a very low dose of medication, prayed for muliples, and whenever we went into the doctor's office, the doctor was shocked. She did the ultrasound and then she stopped and goes, I don't want to scare you … Ryan is still upset with her for starting that sentence that way because he was like, what, what? I knew I was twins. She said I don't want to scare you, but there's three babies in there. We just started cheering like we had won the Olympics. We were so excited. And then because, overnight, we had been thrust into the subculture of infertility and miscarriage and Christians struggling and non-Christians struggling with this and it becoming such a faith or doctor or medical issue … anyway, all that to say is all of a sudden our eyes have been opened to the whole group that was struggling in this way. And so Ryan and I decided, you know what, we're on a roll let's start praying for a TV show because we want people to hear this story. It’s important for people to hear the amazing things that God does. It gives people hope. And, so we did. We just started praying God, and it seems weird, but we just said, please give us a TV show so that we can share this story. People need to hear it. People need to hear that God still answers big prayers. So, we didn't reach out to anybody. We just kept praying and one day Ryan came in my office and said, honey, are you still praying for that TV show? And I said, no, like, I'm just trying to keep you know the three babies that are in me. He goes, I think we still need to pray and that God allows that to happen. But we did, we prayed together and said God, we want to share our story. So, we just kind of prayed one last time and then the next day TLC reached out to us without us doing anything. That was incredible.

Jessilyn Lancaster: Now, how long were you guys through the infertility process from the first miscarriage to when you were able to conceive your triplets? And how old are the babies now?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I think it was about a year process. They are 16 months. It's confusing because they were born a month premature.

Jessilyn Lancaster: And what are their names?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: It’s Blair, Blake and Barrett.

Jessilyn Lancaster: And they are super adorable. You guys should check out “Rattled” if you haven't seen an episode already. Talk to me a little bit about your faith in this process. I know you mentioned the power of prayer, what would you say to the woman who is like, I've prayed for this for 10 years and nothing's happening what do I do?

Julia Jeffress Sadler: I actually am doing a class right now and it’s called In Due Time. It's for couples that are in that season. I'm teaching it online and at our church. And so that's, of course, kind of what you have to talk about. If you're like, well, we just prayed for it and it happened. I think you just can't forget that there is a huge time that we didn't have answers and then we didn't know what was going to happen. I would say one, don't let Satan steal the season. There's a purpose right now, even if all we want to do is get pregnant. It’s really with the things that are good, like wanting to be married, wanting to be pregnant, wanting these things. Even though they're good, they can really distract us from the purpose God has for us today. In our absolute worst year, personally, when we kept having those miscarriages … and side note, something I didn't know, was every time you get pregnant, even if you miscarry, those hormones are still there as if you've given birth. So, that is not really information that is mass shared, and people need to know that. So, it's like I was pregnant three times and then losing this one and then getting them back. Our worst year personally, our absolutely worst year, was our best year in ministry without a doubt, to date. So, even though we had three miscarriages and all the traumas and all the devastation, we started actually a huge emphasis of our 300 teenagers called Tell the World, and it was encouraging them to use their everyday conversations and opportunities to witness. We actually saw teenagers witness to 130 people in downtown Dallas and we saw people getting saved. We had 12 teens that were witnessing the Muslims. I mean, it was incredible and the kids still talk about it. So, just remember, all that to say is even though we really want to get pregnant or want to be married, or whatever the future dream is … our struggles, even though they surprise us, they don't surprise God. So, He has a plan right now. We can't let Satan steal this season because, while we're just going through Instagram, or being jealous of someone else who is pregnant, someone right next to us at Target that is just waiting for someone to tell them how to become a Christian.

 

Connect with Julia Jeffress Sadler

·         Juliajsadler.com

·         On Facebook

·         Twitter

·         On Instagram

 

15

0:00/24:33

Grief in the Womb With Julia Jeffress Sadler