Lisa Saruga: Finding Peace Beyond the Past

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Hey friends, welcome to the Her God Story podcast

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where you will always hear a powerful story to

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encourage and inspire your walk with the Lord.

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I'm your host Jodie Chiricosta, ministry leader

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at Somebody Cares America and international author

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and traveler on this incredible journey with

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Jesus. I'm sure you all noticed our world is

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broken and without God on our side, we could

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easily be overwhelmed by it. But the Bible assures

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us that His mercy holds fast, even when everything

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else feels like it's falling apart. In Lamentations

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3, 22 and 23 in the NIV, we read, Because of

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the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for

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His compassions never fail. They are new every

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morning. Great is His faithfulness. When I was

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growing up, we used to sing a version of this,

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it goes, The steadfast love of the Lord never

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ceases. His mercy's never come to an end. They

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are new every morning, new every morning. Great

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is thy faithfulness, O Lord. Great is thy faithfulness.

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As you can tell, that song still runs through

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my head from time to time because it's such a

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precious truth. God doesn't cause the tragedies

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or injustices we face. Those are the bitter fruit

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of a sinful fallen world. But in His sovereignty

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and steadfast love, He promises to keep us, to

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sustain us, and to see us through. A quote that's

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widely attributed to Charles Spurgeon says, When

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you go through a trial, the sovereignty of God

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is the pillow upon which your head can rest.

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Even in the darkest valleys, we can rest, knowing

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that God is faithful, His mercy is unending,

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and His love never lets us go. That's one of

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the reasons we share these stories here on Her

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God's Story. And it's also why I want to remind

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you about the Somebody Cares Widow and Orphan

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Fund. God's Word calls us to care for widows

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and orphans. And through this fund, we're able

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to meet tangible needs and demonstrate His compassion

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in very real ways. You can learn more and get

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involved at hergodstory .org. My guest today,

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Lisa Saruga, knows what it is to walk through

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unspeakable pain. She survived a brutal assault,

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and through years of deep healing, God has brought

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her to a place where she now advocates for survivor

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justice and ministers healing to others who carry

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profound trauma. Lisa is a licensed professional

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counselor, EMDR trauma therapist, speaker, and

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author. She's also certified as a legal and ethical

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specialist by the American School Counselor Association.

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Lisa's debut book, The Trauma Tree, helps others

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find wholeness in Christ. Her story is one of

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resilience, hope, and the redeeming power of

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God's love. I know you're going to glean a lot

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of truth from her journey. Lisa, welcome to the

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show. Thank you. It's so good to be here. Before

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we talk about some of the painful chapters in

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your life, would you share a little about your

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background? What was your childhood like? What

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was your faith story? Yeah, my childhood was

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pre -internet. So we did a lot of bike riding

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and swimming in the swimming hole and socializing

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face to face. So it was a little different than

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today. I grew up Catholic. I always believed

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in God my whole life, but didn't really have

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a relationship with Christ growing up. So there's

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a difference there and I'm sure we'll talk more

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about that. When I was a teenager, my parents

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separated and got an annulment through the Catholic

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Church. And that whole time period caused me

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to kind of question my identity and question

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the rules of faith, I think. And so that was

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a difficult part. Growing up, I always loved

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music. I got my first guitar when I was 10, although

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I wanted it when I was four. And I started leading

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worship when I was 10. And so it was a very musical.

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And my mom always used to say that other people

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aren't trying to make their kids go and practice.

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She can't get me to stop practicing to come to

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the table. So, um, so music was exactly what

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I wanted to do with my life. And I was so excited

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when I was 18 and I got into the university of

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my choice and into their marching band and, um,

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headed off to start my career in music. what

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I thought was gonna be my career in music, yeah.

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When you were in college, though, your life took

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a violent turn. You were interrupted by a brutal

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assault most of us could never have imagined.

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And at that time, the assailant wasn't found,

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which added to the weight of what you were carrying.

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Would you share a bit about that experience and

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how you were able to one, physically survive,

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and then what that did to you mentally and emotionally?

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Yeah, it wasn't far into my freshman year. It

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was October. So, um, I was, I had a roommate

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that wasn't home very often. Uh, I was sleeping

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in my room alone. I had an event the next morning

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for marching band and I was, um, I had become,

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I had a leadership role in that and I was, I

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was pretty proud of that. So I was just trying

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to get some sleep and, um, unfortunately I woke

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up. in the very early morning hours, not knowing

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why I woke up. I knew something had waken me

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up. And it took a second for things to come into

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focus. But when they did, there was a guy wearing

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a ski mask crouched next to my bed. A friend

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who left my room had left the door unlocked and

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I didn't catch it and he just let himself in.

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So it was pretty horrific few hours. And during

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that time, I was raped. I was nearly suffocated

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and he held me at knife point. I really thought

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my life was going to end at that time. I was

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caught up pretty badly during this whole thing.

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So it was, it was horrific. It was terrifying.

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I think the worst terror that I felt was I realized

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I wasn't sure how to get to heaven. And I thought,

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I think I'm going to die this morning. I don't

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know if I'm going to heaven. That was my worst

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fear. And so I prayed out loud while this was

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going on. I prayed for me because I was terrified.

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I prayed for him because I knew he wasn't doing

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what God would want him to do. And this guy was

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pretty shocked that I did and questioned that,

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of course. Eventually, I had a hand free and

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I kind of poked him in the eyes pretty hard.

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And it really made him mad. He put the knife

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to my throat, told me what he was going to do

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to me. Fortunately, his eyes were sore enough

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that it wasn't long and he decided he needed

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to leave. So when he left, he told me to stay

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on my bed and go to sleep and that he would be

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right outside the door checking on me. And so

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that lasted. quite a long time where I was laying

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in my bed terrified to go anywhere near the door.

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And once in a while he'd open the door and say,

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are you still sleeping? I'm still out here. And

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he probably only did that a few times, but I

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think I laid there for hours because I didn't

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know if he was outside of the door. So that was

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a pretty horrific time as well. When I finally

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did get up. the nerve to get to the door and

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lock it. I called my boyfriend. We called the

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police. I did all the things you're supposed

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to do. I reported it, went to the hospital. My

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wounds were treated and I did one of the first

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earliest rape test kits at the hospital. So that

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was very intense. And then there were weeks and

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weeks of questioning from this detective. And

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at one point, He said, you know, I think maybe

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you watch a lot of TV. This sounds pretty sensationalized.

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And I realized at that moment he didn't believe

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my story. I mean, they could see that I was cut.

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They could see evidence in the room, but they

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didn't believe my story. So my case was closed

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within three months because there were no suspects.

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I never saw the guy's face. So, so that was kind

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of frustrating. because he didn't believe me.

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Now I didn't learn this for many, for decades,

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but they never sent the rape test kit in to the

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state, so it never got processed. And I realized

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like nobody around me after that was talking

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about it. There were a few people who knew, but

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nobody was talking about it. And so as a lot

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of people do when they're in trauma, I convinced

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myself it was no big deal. and decided I wasn't

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going to talk about it either. I was happy the

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day before. I was going to continue being happy.

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And so I just, I went back to class that Monday,

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right back to all of my activities and I just

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didn't talk about it. Well, I mean, that horrific

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experience, it did change the course of your

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life. I mean, even though you weren't talking

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about it, it shaped your career path, your faith

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journey, how you saw yourself, how you saw others.

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Just share a few ways it impacted you and the

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direction your life took afterward. Yeah, immediately

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afterward, I was pretty hyper vigilant. So I

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would walk on campus and, you know, wonder if

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he was watching me. Was he around? Was he somebody

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I knew? So it, you know, immediately it changed

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things for me. I couldn't go back to that room.

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I did not want to go back to that room. And so

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I moved in with a couple of friends and we were

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all 18 and we were kids trying to figure out

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how to deal with trauma. That's what it comes

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down to. We're still friends. They were wonderful

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women, but we were kids. And so that caused a

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lot of tension in our room because I was hypervigilant

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and they were impatient. It was a pretty tough

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time. I always knew I was going to study music.

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I think I've already said that. But in the aftermath,

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my heart was not in that anymore. I was, I was

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an all A student in music and I knew if I quit,

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it would be, you know, that first year they're

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weeding people out and people would think that

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it was because I wasn't cut out for it. And I

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knew that wasn't the point, but about a year

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later, I had changed majors and I decided I was

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going to be an attorney and I was going to put

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guys with masks on and behind bars. And so I

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changed my major to political science, took my

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LSATs, got into law school and that was my new

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intended career pathway. I think fortunately,

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there was a huge law firm in Toledo, Ohio that

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picked me up and they let me start working the

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summer before law school. So I had a few months

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in this law firm before law school would start.

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And what I realized was I really like law. I

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still do. I'm still very involved. But what I

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was noticing was at that time, this was a long

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time ago, but at that time, only about a half

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a percent of rapists went to jail. That's unbelievable.

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That is unbelievable. People say things have

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changed since the Me Too movement, and they have,

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but still only two and a half percent of rapists

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go to jail. So we had a lot of work to do. Wow.

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But I realized at that time that as long as rapists

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were walking free, we were going to need counselors

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because there were a lot of women that were suffering,

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not just women, women, children, men were suffering.

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And so two weeks before I was supposed to start

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law school, I quit and I registered for graduate

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school where I studied counseling and became

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a licensed therapist. And I studied college student

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personnel so that I could counsel on college

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campuses specifically. But during that time,

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too, as an undergrad, I got involved in the fellowship

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of Christian athletes and made friends who were

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Christians and started learning a little bit

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more about Jesus. So I would say that my faith

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walk was really kickstarted by the incident.

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Yeah, I mean, many people would reject God, but

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you turned to the Lord in that time. I did. Yeah.

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And like I said, I always was a believer, but

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I didn't read the Bible. I didn't know a lot

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about what Jesus was offering me. That was a

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key time to kind of develop that relationship

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and that walk with Jesus. Yeah. So when did you

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actually make that determination, I am going

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to follow Jesus? And you were learning about

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it. When did you actually say, this is it? Yeah.

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By the time I switched majors, I had already

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completed my education degree. So I was certified

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teacher. So I did student teach the end of my

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senior year as an undergrad. And I had to go

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someplace not near the college to do that. And

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my eighth grade teacher invited me to go and

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stay with her. And she was wonderful. I needed

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her in my life then. She was a good listener.

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She was also just a wonderful Christian woman.

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She had always been a Christian influence in

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my life. She's the one that gave me my first

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Bible. And I went to church with her and that

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is when I accepted Christ. So thank you to Mother

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Hembold. So as you grew in your faith in the

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Lord and you got into your career, you know,

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moving on with life, you also went through the

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deep pain of two divorces. In those seasons,

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I'm sure you wrestled even more with your identity

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and even your credibility as a witness for Christ.

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Share about that journey and what God taught

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you through that. That was such an unexpected

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journey. You know, my parents had divorced, but

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they loved each other. There just was some horrific

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things that happened. And I was convinced that

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I would be married for life. So I married my

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first husband right out of college. And we did

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attend church together and serve together. We

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were married 10 years. We had two sons and I

00:14:44.600 --> 00:14:47.679
love my sons to death. It was rough. It was a

00:14:47.679 --> 00:14:50.360
really rough 10 years for a number of reasons.

00:14:50.899 --> 00:14:54.600
After 10 years, he moved out. We got divorced

00:14:54.600 --> 00:14:58.759
and he got married a week later. So that was

00:14:58.759 --> 00:15:02.779
pretty shocking. Just the rejection of that and

00:15:02.779 --> 00:15:05.200
the embarrassment of having gone through a divorce.

00:15:06.379 --> 00:15:09.879
But I turned right to Jesus then too. And it

00:15:09.879 --> 00:15:13.279
was during that time I read a book by Charles

00:15:13.279 --> 00:15:16.470
Stanley. And it was called The Blessings of Brokenness.

00:15:17.210 --> 00:15:20.350
And that book was so meaningful to me at the

00:15:20.350 --> 00:15:24.590
time to find that, of course, bad things happen

00:15:24.590 --> 00:15:27.090
to all of us. And we're promised that in scripture,

00:15:27.190 --> 00:15:28.570
you know, in this world, we're going to have

00:15:28.570 --> 00:15:30.870
trouble, but take heart, he's overcome the world.

00:15:31.190 --> 00:15:34.129
And I really clung to that scripture verse during

00:15:34.129 --> 00:15:38.950
the divorce and after. And I asked God almost

00:15:38.950 --> 00:15:41.549
every day, please be the father of our home.

00:15:41.870 --> 00:15:46.259
I can't do this alone. And so that's when my

00:15:46.259 --> 00:15:49.100
relationship with God really started to grow

00:15:49.100 --> 00:15:53.779
deep. Thank goodness. About two years later,

00:15:53.779 --> 00:15:56.700
I got married again, and this time I was looking

00:15:56.700 --> 00:16:01.340
for a Christian man. His dad was a pastor. His

00:16:01.340 --> 00:16:06.419
family were missionaries. He was very quiet and

00:16:06.419 --> 00:16:10.000
a gentle soul. I was really excited to be starting

00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:14.309
over again. But five years into that marriage,

00:16:15.309 --> 00:16:17.590
he moved out because he had a girlfriend who

00:16:17.590 --> 00:16:21.610
was pregnant. It happened again. And the woman

00:16:21.610 --> 00:16:24.409
he was seeing, her husband and I were on the

00:16:24.409 --> 00:16:26.350
board of our church together. We were leaders

00:16:26.350 --> 00:16:28.389
in the church and while we were at meetings,

00:16:28.850 --> 00:16:31.549
they were having an affair. He stayed at that

00:16:31.549 --> 00:16:34.250
church. It was really, I couldn't stay at that

00:16:34.250 --> 00:16:38.830
church. I was just too hurt. It was, it was complicated,

00:16:38.889 --> 00:16:42.750
right? And so I decided at that time I was going

00:16:42.750 --> 00:16:44.529
to go look for another church. And this time

00:16:44.529 --> 00:16:47.190
I was really going to look for somebody, a church

00:16:47.190 --> 00:16:51.690
that the doctrine exactly fit what I believed.

00:16:53.490 --> 00:16:56.929
And so I visited many churches with my kids during

00:16:56.929 --> 00:17:01.009
that time. And I decided I was never going to

00:17:01.009 --> 00:17:04.390
get married again. Um, after the second husband

00:17:04.390 --> 00:17:07.109
left, I called my pastor and your words are exactly

00:17:07.109 --> 00:17:09.109
what I said to him. I will never be a credible

00:17:09.109 --> 00:17:12.009
witness again. I'm a twice divorced woman. And

00:17:12.009 --> 00:17:14.289
then that idea was reinforced by some of the

00:17:14.289 --> 00:17:16.750
churches that I visited because I would, every

00:17:16.750 --> 00:17:19.250
church, I would say, you know, tell me how my

00:17:19.250 --> 00:17:22.289
sons and I can serve. And then I would tell them,

00:17:22.289 --> 00:17:25.609
you know, I'm, I'm a musician. I'm happy to be

00:17:25.609 --> 00:17:30.119
on praise team or. Organize music, whatever needs

00:17:30.119 --> 00:17:33.599
to be done, that's kind of an area that I have

00:17:33.599 --> 00:17:38.240
some abilities in. And I had one church that

00:17:38.240 --> 00:17:40.480
told me I would never be welcome to sing in their

00:17:40.480 --> 00:17:43.980
church because I was a divorced woman, which

00:17:43.980 --> 00:17:48.359
reinforced that idea that I'm damaged. I'm no

00:17:48.359 --> 00:17:54.160
longer credible. So that was humbling. It was

00:17:54.160 --> 00:17:58.339
really humbling. My kids and I continued to look

00:17:58.339 --> 00:18:00.519
for a church. And by this time, I hadn't filed

00:18:00.519 --> 00:18:03.180
for divorce. My husband had left. They were having

00:18:03.180 --> 00:18:06.880
a baby. Um, I was praying for my prodigal husband.

00:18:07.599 --> 00:18:11.259
And when I finally found the church that I still

00:18:11.259 --> 00:18:13.960
attend today, perfect fit, God knew what he was

00:18:13.960 --> 00:18:18.000
doing. Um, the pastor there said, you need to

00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:21.460
file for divorce. And he, he walked with me through

00:18:21.460 --> 00:18:25.299
that process. Praise God that he did. you know,

00:18:25.359 --> 00:18:29.559
that he saw that it was beyond my control, that

00:18:29.559 --> 00:18:35.099
I had was not to blame for this. And that scripturally,

00:18:35.319 --> 00:18:39.160
there is justification for divorce. And boy,

00:18:39.400 --> 00:18:41.640
I really needed I needed to hear that from my

00:18:41.640 --> 00:18:45.680
pastor. So that's the church I landed at. And

00:18:45.680 --> 00:18:49.079
I did end up doing praise team. And in fact,

00:18:51.140 --> 00:18:54.440
Probably 15 years after I started that church,

00:18:54.799 --> 00:18:57.420
our new pastor called me and asked if I would

00:18:57.420 --> 00:19:00.319
be the director of worship ministries. And at

00:19:00.319 --> 00:19:02.940
that time I was being called, I knew I was being

00:19:02.940 --> 00:19:05.420
called to some kind of ministry. I didn't know

00:19:05.420 --> 00:19:09.380
what it looked like, but I wept when he called

00:19:09.380 --> 00:19:13.539
me. It was like God saying, you are still usable.

00:19:14.579 --> 00:19:19.720
You're, you are still mine. And, um, it was powerful.

00:19:19.869 --> 00:19:22.470
to just have that justification that, yes, I

00:19:22.470 --> 00:19:24.829
can still be a credible witness for God. In fact,

00:19:25.029 --> 00:19:31.269
let's lead worship. Yeah. And so that was hugely

00:19:31.269 --> 00:19:34.950
impactful to me. Oh, yeah. I mean, God's so faithful

00:19:34.950 --> 00:19:37.990
to let you know He always accept us. And isn't

00:19:37.990 --> 00:19:40.309
it sweet that He opened the doors for you to

00:19:40.309 --> 00:19:44.619
share with Christ with others, too? But along

00:19:44.619 --> 00:19:47.619
the way, God had another unexpected blessing

00:19:47.619 --> 00:19:50.720
for you, a wonderful godly husband. So how did

00:19:50.720 --> 00:19:52.200
that come about? Because you didn't want to get

00:19:52.200 --> 00:19:55.000
married again. I was never getting married again.

00:19:56.660 --> 00:19:59.359
You know, a couple of years after that second

00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:03.660
divorce, I had started a singles ministry at

00:20:03.660 --> 00:20:05.900
our church and we had about 70 singles that would

00:20:05.900 --> 00:20:11.539
get together. And I called the Single purpose

00:20:11.539 --> 00:20:14.519
I wanted to talk about finding purpose in singlehood

00:20:14.519 --> 00:20:17.500
You know being happy as a single being able to

00:20:17.500 --> 00:20:19.640
serve God as a single because a lot of singles

00:20:19.640 --> 00:20:23.819
feel like they don't fit in anywhere And so that

00:20:23.819 --> 00:20:26.059
was the the focus of this ministry and people

00:20:26.059 --> 00:20:29.059
kept asking me, you know Have you ever met Barry

00:20:29.059 --> 00:20:32.200
Anderson? And I hadn't and they said, you know,

00:20:32.200 --> 00:20:34.440
he's lived in the same town for 15 years It's

00:20:34.440 --> 00:20:36.539
a tiny town, but I had never met him didn't know

00:20:36.539 --> 00:20:40.960
who he was in the meantime Barry Anderson was

00:20:40.960 --> 00:20:43.720
leading a divorce recovery group in another church

00:20:43.720 --> 00:20:46.980
and people kept asking him, do you know Lisa

00:20:46.980 --> 00:20:52.339
Saruga? And, um, he was, he had, he didn't know

00:20:52.339 --> 00:20:54.619
who I was either, but the reason people were

00:20:54.619 --> 00:20:56.579
asking is because some of my singles might want

00:20:56.579 --> 00:20:58.700
to be a part of his divorce recovery. Some of

00:20:58.700 --> 00:21:00.700
his people from divorce recovery would like to

00:21:00.700 --> 00:21:03.359
be in singles group. So he came to the singles

00:21:03.359 --> 00:21:09.809
group, um, to check it out, but. It was only

00:21:09.809 --> 00:21:13.150
days before that. I journal every day and I was

00:21:13.150 --> 00:21:15.309
kind of talking to God in my journal and I said,

00:21:15.789 --> 00:21:17.390
you know, I don't ever plan to get married again.

00:21:17.390 --> 00:21:19.970
I wouldn't trust myself to choose a man, but

00:21:19.970 --> 00:21:24.369
sometimes it's kind of lonely. And I wrote, God,

00:21:24.390 --> 00:21:26.190
if you want me to get married again, you're going

00:21:26.190 --> 00:21:28.589
to have to choose him. And here's my list of

00:21:28.589 --> 00:21:32.430
non -negotiables. And I wrote like two pages

00:21:32.430 --> 00:21:35.789
of things. This guy, like he has to meet every

00:21:35.789 --> 00:21:38.779
one of these or I won't take a second look. And,

00:21:38.779 --> 00:21:40.900
um, the very first thing I wrote was he has to

00:21:40.900 --> 00:21:45.980
have first Corinthians 13 memorized because that's

00:21:45.980 --> 00:21:47.960
where we learn about love. That's how you should

00:21:47.960 --> 00:21:51.799
love a spouse. Right? Yeah. Um, so anyway, Barry

00:21:51.799 --> 00:21:55.400
Anderson came to the singles group, uh, asked

00:21:55.400 --> 00:21:58.099
somebody about me right away because he was interested

00:21:58.099 --> 00:22:01.900
and they said, Oh, she doesn't date. Um, she

00:22:01.900 --> 00:22:04.039
doesn't date anybody in this group. That's what

00:22:04.039 --> 00:22:08.259
they knew. And when the night was done. He, he

00:22:08.259 --> 00:22:10.000
had introduced himself to me through, through

00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:12.180
the night. And when the night was done, he said,

00:22:12.380 --> 00:22:14.779
okay, I'm not ever coming back to this group.

00:22:14.920 --> 00:22:18.140
So will you go for a motorcycle ride with me?

00:22:20.420 --> 00:22:23.099
And, uh, I thought, well, can't hurt anything

00:22:23.099 --> 00:22:24.940
to go for a motorcycle ride. He knows I'm not

00:22:24.940 --> 00:22:28.619
dating. Right? Yeah. So it's a fun thing to do.

00:22:28.779 --> 00:22:31.339
It was, yeah. So we went for a motorcycle ride

00:22:31.339 --> 00:22:35.480
and it was fun. It was funny. He's funny. Um,

00:22:35.480 --> 00:22:38.769
it was good company. And so he asks a couple

00:22:38.769 --> 00:22:40.710
of days later, would I go for a walk with him?

00:22:41.289 --> 00:22:45.150
And I did, I went for a walk with him and out

00:22:45.150 --> 00:22:48.190
of the blue, he started quoting 1 Corinthians

00:22:48.190 --> 00:22:53.849
13. And it was just, that sounds really strange,

00:22:53.849 --> 00:22:55.890
but we were kind of talking about our faith and

00:22:55.890 --> 00:22:57.970
we were talking about scripture verses and we

00:22:57.970 --> 00:23:00.089
started singing some hymns together, which, you

00:23:00.089 --> 00:23:02.390
know, music was on my list and he likes to sing.

00:23:03.799 --> 00:23:06.039
So that was, you know, but when he started quoting

00:23:06.039 --> 00:23:08.920
first Corinthians 13 in that moment, I was like,

00:23:09.059 --> 00:23:12.200
okay, God, I'm listening. I'm listening. I'm

00:23:12.200 --> 00:23:14.680
going to pay attention here. Things progressed

00:23:14.680 --> 00:23:18.359
and we've married 20 years now. Wow. He's a good,

00:23:18.359 --> 00:23:21.720
godly man. And we've done a lot of ministry together.

00:23:21.740 --> 00:23:23.980
I bet you have. Well, you know, God's so good

00:23:23.980 --> 00:23:26.240
to bring you a life partner because the next

00:23:26.240 --> 00:23:28.960
part of your journey was a little rocky. Um,

00:23:28.960 --> 00:23:31.519
you mentioned earlier that for many years you

00:23:31.519 --> 00:23:34.579
buried the trauma of that assault. and never

00:23:34.579 --> 00:23:36.559
really dealt with it, even though you were working

00:23:36.559 --> 00:23:38.980
in the field of counseling. But God wanted to

00:23:38.980 --> 00:23:42.039
do a deeper work of healing in you, which is

00:23:42.039 --> 00:23:44.960
really quite a story. Would you share about that

00:23:44.960 --> 00:23:46.960
miraculous journey that he brought you on? It's

00:23:46.960 --> 00:23:50.920
so full of miracles, but we had five kids between

00:23:50.920 --> 00:23:55.759
us. And when the last kid moved out, both of

00:23:55.759 --> 00:23:59.539
his parents were struggling with dementia. And

00:23:59.539 --> 00:24:01.740
so we decided we needed to take care of them

00:24:01.740 --> 00:24:04.940
and our house was not. uh, set up well for that.

00:24:04.960 --> 00:24:09.119
So we moved into their basement and shortly thereafter,

00:24:09.119 --> 00:24:13.039
uh, both of my parents got really sick. My, my

00:24:13.039 --> 00:24:15.579
mom and my stepdad. So we ended up, we were in

00:24:15.579 --> 00:24:20.299
this house taking care of four, um, four parents

00:24:20.299 --> 00:24:27.500
and boy, that's stressful. And, uh, we actually

00:24:27.500 --> 00:24:29.500
just moved out of there. So we were there 11

00:24:29.500 --> 00:24:32.920
years taking care of parents. But at a particularly

00:24:32.920 --> 00:24:37.099
stressful time, I decided I was going to get

00:24:37.099 --> 00:24:40.019
rid of all negativity in the house. I mean, I

00:24:40.019 --> 00:24:42.880
tore up divorce papers. I got rid of anything

00:24:42.880 --> 00:24:45.559
that made me think of anything negative. And

00:24:45.559 --> 00:24:48.299
I realized that I had written the details down

00:24:48.299 --> 00:24:51.059
of that assault and put it in my nightstand and

00:24:51.059 --> 00:24:52.980
it had lived right there next to where I slept

00:24:52.980 --> 00:24:56.359
for however many years, 35 years. And I thought

00:24:56.359 --> 00:24:59.039
that shouldn't be there. And I pulled it out

00:24:59.039 --> 00:25:01.140
and I ripped it up. And I remember saying out

00:25:01.140 --> 00:25:03.740
loud as I ripped it, God, I'm done with this.

00:25:03.740 --> 00:25:06.740
This is yours. And I threw it away. So this was

00:25:06.740 --> 00:25:10.000
just maybe a week later that the stressful day

00:25:10.000 --> 00:25:12.099
happened. And I, and I said, again, out loud,

00:25:12.200 --> 00:25:14.180
God, how much stress do you think I can take?

00:25:15.619 --> 00:25:19.500
Never ask God that because within five minutes,

00:25:19.700 --> 00:25:24.079
my phone rang. So the police called from my university

00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:26.380
and said they were working on a case and they

00:25:26.380 --> 00:25:29.119
needed to talk to me. And I didn't know what

00:25:29.119 --> 00:25:31.019
they wanted to talk about. I had worked for the

00:25:31.019 --> 00:25:33.759
university, uh, things that happened while I

00:25:33.759 --> 00:25:37.240
worked there. Um, you know, interestingly enough,

00:25:37.380 --> 00:25:41.319
my, my best friend, when the assault happened

00:25:41.319 --> 00:25:44.180
my freshman year, he and I both went on to work

00:25:44.180 --> 00:25:46.559
for the university. We stayed friends for a long

00:25:46.559 --> 00:25:50.240
time. And at this time, 35 years later, he was

00:25:50.240 --> 00:25:53.079
the vice president of student affairs at that

00:25:53.079 --> 00:25:55.380
campus. So the police didn't tell me what they

00:25:55.380 --> 00:25:58.009
were coming for. So I called. My friend Tony

00:25:58.009 --> 00:26:01.470
and I said, you know, Hey, did you and I do something

00:26:01.470 --> 00:26:03.950
back in the day? Cause police want to talk to

00:26:03.950 --> 00:26:07.230
me. And he said, I don't know, but I will call

00:26:07.230 --> 00:26:10.450
and find out what's going on. And I just love

00:26:10.450 --> 00:26:12.970
that God did this. God introduced me to Tony

00:26:12.970 --> 00:26:15.450
my freshman year in college. And I know he knew

00:26:15.450 --> 00:26:17.769
full well that 35 years later, Tony was going

00:26:17.769 --> 00:26:20.910
to be the one to call and tell me that the police

00:26:20.910 --> 00:26:23.750
had the identity of the guy who wore the ski

00:26:23.750 --> 00:26:29.890
mask. Wow. Yeah. So here we are 35 years later

00:26:29.890 --> 00:26:32.690
and I get this call that my cold case is being

00:26:32.690 --> 00:26:36.750
reopened and I had worked with PTSD, I call it

00:26:36.750 --> 00:26:41.829
PTSI, post -traumatic stress symptoms with many

00:26:41.829 --> 00:26:45.130
other people, but I really had never experienced

00:26:45.130 --> 00:26:47.930
it. You would think I would have at the time

00:26:47.930 --> 00:26:50.430
of the trauma, but I really just dissociated

00:26:50.430 --> 00:26:53.190
and didn't think about it, didn't process it.

00:26:53.509 --> 00:26:56.029
So here we are 35 years later and it's like,

00:26:55.980 --> 00:26:58.440
This just happened to me. I mean, I couldn't

00:26:58.440 --> 00:27:02.500
talk. I was crying. My husband kept asking me

00:27:02.500 --> 00:27:08.599
if I was OK, and I didn't know if I was OK. When

00:27:08.599 --> 00:27:11.480
we talk about flashbacks, it was like I was 18

00:27:11.480 --> 00:27:14.160
years old again. I could remember every detail.

00:27:14.240 --> 00:27:17.180
I could remember the sight, the smell, everything

00:27:17.180 --> 00:27:23.630
that was going on. So it was, it was a hard time

00:27:23.630 --> 00:27:27.369
and it was three more months of interviews and

00:27:27.369 --> 00:27:33.509
investigation. Um, and it was, wow. It was really

00:27:33.509 --> 00:27:37.109
crazy. And then three months into it, the prosecuting

00:27:37.109 --> 00:27:40.589
attorney let us know. And he, he had said the

00:27:40.589 --> 00:27:43.670
whole time that he was going to really prosecute

00:27:43.670 --> 00:27:47.630
this guy to the full extent. Um, and this particular

00:27:47.630 --> 00:27:50.430
prosecutor was in the news because he had dropped

00:27:50.430 --> 00:27:54.809
a couple of other sexual assault cases too. And

00:27:54.809 --> 00:27:59.769
three months in, he said, I made a mistake. There's

00:27:59.769 --> 00:28:02.170
no statute of limitations in Michigan now on

00:28:02.170 --> 00:28:06.109
a crime that violent, but there was when it happened.

00:28:06.950 --> 00:28:10.809
And we can't retroactively remove statutes of

00:28:10.809 --> 00:28:14.230
limitations. So basically this guy hid his identity

00:28:14.230 --> 00:28:16.950
long enough that He couldn't be arrested. He

00:28:16.950 --> 00:28:19.309
could walk in and confess to the crime and he

00:28:19.309 --> 00:28:22.910
couldn't be arrested. So now the law sees him

00:28:22.910 --> 00:28:26.829
as innocent and protects him. So I can't say

00:28:26.829 --> 00:28:33.089
his name publicly, he could sue me. It was horrifying

00:28:33.089 --> 00:28:35.609
to hear that, that the law now is going to protect

00:28:35.609 --> 00:28:39.970
him and not me. Um, and not long after that,

00:28:40.049 --> 00:28:41.910
I got a call from the attorney general's office

00:28:41.910 --> 00:28:43.950
and they said, you know, this guy is a person

00:28:43.950 --> 00:28:46.529
of interest in two rape homicides. We think he's

00:28:46.529 --> 00:28:49.390
very dangerous and we have reason to believe

00:28:49.390 --> 00:28:51.650
he's looking for you. They told me I needed to

00:28:51.650 --> 00:28:53.710
take safety precautions and they couldn't help

00:28:53.710 --> 00:28:57.029
me with safety because he was never prosecuted.

00:28:57.309 --> 00:28:59.289
So there isn't, there's nobody saying I was a

00:28:59.289 --> 00:29:01.369
victim. I'm not a victim if he can't be prosecuted.

00:29:02.509 --> 00:29:05.890
So they suggested I talk to my chief of police

00:29:05.890 --> 00:29:10.329
in my hometown. So I went to him and put together

00:29:10.329 --> 00:29:12.809
a safety plan. They also recommended that I change

00:29:12.809 --> 00:29:17.490
my name. And so Lisa Saruga became my new name.

00:29:18.410 --> 00:29:22.930
And it's a name that I use today, but I was using

00:29:22.930 --> 00:29:24.970
it for safety reasons. Now I use it because that's

00:29:24.970 --> 00:29:28.809
what people know me by. He couldn't be prosecuted.

00:29:29.430 --> 00:29:33.390
He was looking for me. We put together the safety

00:29:33.390 --> 00:29:37.829
plan. And I also started therapy myself, and

00:29:37.829 --> 00:29:42.849
I did some EMDR therapy, eye movement desensitization

00:29:42.849 --> 00:29:46.849
reprocessing. And it's, as a therapist, I can

00:29:46.849 --> 00:29:49.589
tell you that trauma, the memories with those

00:29:49.589 --> 00:29:52.049
strong emotions live in a part of our brain called

00:29:52.049 --> 00:29:57.589
the amygdala, and it's a subconscious part of

00:29:57.589 --> 00:30:00.779
our brain. We can't access it. But it holds onto

00:30:00.779 --> 00:30:02.900
the memory. And that's what happened when I was

00:30:02.900 --> 00:30:06.200
told that the case was reopened. Like my amygdala

00:30:06.200 --> 00:30:08.619
just let go of all those emotions and memories.

00:30:09.019 --> 00:30:11.460
And I was just triggered and flooded with all

00:30:11.460 --> 00:30:15.819
of that again. But this EMDR therapy really deeply

00:30:15.819 --> 00:30:19.740
touches into the amygdala. And I found great

00:30:19.740 --> 00:30:24.799
healing during that time. And then on the 35th

00:30:24.799 --> 00:30:27.759
anniversary of this assault, which was only a

00:30:27.759 --> 00:30:31.779
few months after the case was I decided I wanted

00:30:31.779 --> 00:30:35.900
to do something. I had never shared my story

00:30:35.900 --> 00:30:39.039
and I started calling legislators and attorneys

00:30:39.039 --> 00:30:41.259
and just kind of seeing what I could do. How

00:30:41.259 --> 00:30:45.599
can I get involved? And at one point I called

00:30:45.599 --> 00:30:50.200
my state representative and the state reps chief

00:30:50.200 --> 00:30:52.000
of staff said, you know, you really want you

00:30:52.000 --> 00:30:55.519
should talk to your federal representative. He's

00:30:55.519 --> 00:30:57.720
actually in your hometown for a debate tonight.

00:30:59.400 --> 00:31:02.660
And it starts in 30 minutes. So I got off the

00:31:02.660 --> 00:31:04.700
phone, I went to this debate, and the very first

00:31:04.700 --> 00:31:07.359
question that they asked was about sexual assault,

00:31:07.440 --> 00:31:12.200
which never happens in debates. And he answered

00:31:12.200 --> 00:31:17.339
it beautifully. And so I started writing a note

00:31:17.339 --> 00:31:20.140
to him during the debate, and it ended up being

00:31:20.140 --> 00:31:22.500
quite long. I told the whole story of what had

00:31:22.500 --> 00:31:24.900
happened. You know, I want to do something. I

00:31:24.900 --> 00:31:27.299
want to make a difference. And I prayed, God,

00:31:27.400 --> 00:31:30.339
if, if you want me to give this to him, you know,

00:31:30.619 --> 00:31:33.059
let me get close enough to hand it to him. Well,

00:31:33.059 --> 00:31:35.299
when the debate was done, I was walking out and

00:31:35.299 --> 00:31:39.480
for some reason that representative thought he

00:31:39.480 --> 00:31:43.920
recognized me and he stopped me to talk. Uh,

00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:46.759
so I thought, okay, that's God. And I was able

00:31:46.759 --> 00:31:50.160
to give him this note. And the next morning he

00:31:50.160 --> 00:31:52.940
called me. He invited me to Washington DC and

00:31:52.940 --> 00:31:55.519
I've been advocating for legislation to end sexual

00:31:55.519 --> 00:31:59.460
violence ever since. Um, and you talk about miracles.

00:31:59.619 --> 00:32:02.299
I mean, God has opened so many doors. And one

00:32:02.299 --> 00:32:04.279
of the, the very first time I was in Washington

00:32:04.279 --> 00:32:07.480
DC, I asked somebody directions on the Metro

00:32:07.480 --> 00:32:10.279
and he said he was an author. And I said, I'm

00:32:10.279 --> 00:32:13.720
writing a book too. And, uh, we trade traded

00:32:13.720 --> 00:32:16.220
cards and it turned out, uh, this guy was John

00:32:16.220 --> 00:32:19.000
Cariaco, who was the whistleblower and the waterboarding

00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:22.819
incident. And he called me that night and said,

00:32:22.859 --> 00:32:24.740
I have a friend interested in your story. And

00:32:24.740 --> 00:32:27.140
this friend was the investigative reporter, Brian

00:32:27.140 --> 00:32:30.059
Ross, and we've been working on a documentary

00:32:30.059 --> 00:32:35.119
ever since. So God has really opened doors that

00:32:35.119 --> 00:32:37.119
will hopefully lead to change someday for other

00:32:37.119 --> 00:32:40.000
people, too. Well, after all of that, everything

00:32:40.000 --> 00:32:42.680
you went through, everything you relived, you

00:32:42.680 --> 00:32:45.059
really didn't get the closure you expected. How

00:32:45.059 --> 00:32:47.440
did you come to terms with what happened? Yeah,

00:32:47.440 --> 00:32:51.819
you know, I really thought I asked God over and

00:32:51.819 --> 00:32:54.079
over again, why would you bring this up? I had

00:32:54.079 --> 00:32:56.420
let it go, right? There's just no sense in this

00:32:56.420 --> 00:32:59.500
coming back up 35 years later. And I had convinced

00:32:59.500 --> 00:33:01.920
myself that the reason it was reopened was because

00:33:01.920 --> 00:33:04.500
I was going to get closure and justice. Yeah.

00:33:04.579 --> 00:33:08.819
Yeah. And, and I read early on after the case

00:33:08.819 --> 00:33:13.700
was reopened Psalm 127 13, I will see the goodness

00:33:13.700 --> 00:33:16.559
of the Lord and the land of the living. And I

00:33:16.559 --> 00:33:18.960
read that and thought, Okay, I'm not gonna have

00:33:18.960 --> 00:33:21.079
to wait till the next left lifetime to get justice

00:33:21.079 --> 00:33:22.740
and closure. It's gonna happen in the land of

00:33:22.740 --> 00:33:25.460
the living That's what this is telling me, right?

00:33:26.460 --> 00:33:29.960
The problem is we don't get closure in this lifetime.

00:33:30.759 --> 00:33:34.319
That's not something that we're guaranteed and

00:33:34.319 --> 00:33:36.119
Justice doesn't always look like what we think

00:33:36.119 --> 00:33:40.119
it should look like and so when my case was closed

00:33:40.119 --> 00:33:42.720
That was the scripture verse that God brought

00:33:42.720 --> 00:33:47.900
back to mind again And so I was angry. I was

00:33:47.900 --> 00:33:50.680
really angry at God at that time. And so I would

00:33:50.680 --> 00:33:55.019
journal and give him everything that I was thinking.

00:33:56.980 --> 00:33:59.720
But what was revealed to me at that time was,

00:34:00.500 --> 00:34:03.200
it doesn't say, I will give you closure in the

00:34:03.200 --> 00:34:06.900
land of the living. It says, I will see the goodness

00:34:06.900 --> 00:34:12.019
of the Lord in the land of the living. And that's

00:34:12.019 --> 00:34:15.389
vastly different. And I realized that I am seeing

00:34:15.389 --> 00:34:17.469
the goodness of God in the land of the living.

00:34:17.690 --> 00:34:20.210
I have a husband. I have a family. I have a house

00:34:20.210 --> 00:34:22.690
over my head. And I started thanking God for

00:34:22.690 --> 00:34:26.050
those things that I can be grateful for and just

00:34:26.050 --> 00:34:31.110
really focused on living in that goodness. Yeah.

00:34:31.110 --> 00:34:35.809
And I think that that was huge. The other thing,

00:34:36.750 --> 00:34:41.090
yeah. And then this Tony, the one that was my

00:34:41.090 --> 00:34:44.780
friend. Um, when it happened and told me who,

00:34:44.860 --> 00:34:48.139
you know, the case was being reopened, um, he

00:34:48.139 --> 00:34:51.619
called me and said, the building where you were

00:34:51.619 --> 00:34:55.039
assaulted is going to be torn down. And he invited

00:34:55.039 --> 00:34:56.960
me to be the last person to walk through the

00:34:56.960 --> 00:34:59.880
building before it was raised. And so my husband

00:34:59.880 --> 00:35:04.940
and I went. And I remember thinking, oh, I said

00:35:04.940 --> 00:35:07.079
to my husband, this is silly. This is, I probably

00:35:07.079 --> 00:35:09.659
shouldn't do this. This is pretty dramatic. And

00:35:09.659 --> 00:35:11.500
I said that to Tony too. And both of them said,

00:35:11.500 --> 00:35:15.659
oh, you're going. So we went back and when I

00:35:15.659 --> 00:35:19.239
got to the room where it happened, I saw the

00:35:19.239 --> 00:35:22.800
wall that I had pounded on and screaming for

00:35:22.800 --> 00:35:29.780
help. And it was an emotional time. So my husband

00:35:29.780 --> 00:35:32.260
handed me a handful of Sharpie markers and said

00:35:32.260 --> 00:35:34.179
go ahead and write till you run out of ink right

00:35:34.179 --> 00:35:37.420
on the wall whatever you want and they he and

00:35:37.420 --> 00:35:39.840
Tony went out in the hallway and I I wrote the

00:35:39.840 --> 00:35:42.320
guy's name that I had just learned on the wall

00:35:42.320 --> 00:35:44.500
and I started writing scripture verses all around

00:35:44.500 --> 00:35:49.059
him which sounds all You know nice and holy but

00:35:49.059 --> 00:35:52.159
but I was writing things about you know hell

00:35:52.159 --> 00:35:57.380
and fire and damnation. Vengeance of God. Yes.

00:35:58.079 --> 00:36:00.780
And when I thought I was done, I stepped back

00:36:00.780 --> 00:36:03.280
and look at that wall. And I really think God

00:36:03.280 --> 00:36:06.440
convicted me. That was not what he was thinking.

00:36:06.980 --> 00:36:09.039
And I stepped back up to the wall and I wrote,

00:36:09.280 --> 00:36:13.079
even you are not too far gone for God. And then

00:36:13.079 --> 00:36:15.079
I wrote scripture verses about, you know, God

00:36:15.079 --> 00:36:17.500
wants that none should perish. I didn't know

00:36:17.500 --> 00:36:19.980
if I was going to heaven when I was scared I

00:36:19.980 --> 00:36:24.980
was dying because of my own sin. And who knows

00:36:24.980 --> 00:36:30.139
if this guy has found Jesus? So I really kind

00:36:30.139 --> 00:36:32.659
of changed the focus of my writing on the wall.

00:36:33.239 --> 00:36:35.679
And when I was done, I went back out in the hallway

00:36:35.679 --> 00:36:38.139
and Tony handed me a sledgehammer and said, okay,

00:36:38.199 --> 00:36:40.280
where do you want to start? And I thought, I'm

00:36:40.280 --> 00:36:42.239
going to put a hole through that wall that I

00:36:42.239 --> 00:36:44.179
pounded on. I'm going to chip this guy's name

00:36:44.179 --> 00:36:46.179
off the wall and put a hole right through it.

00:36:46.460 --> 00:36:49.480
And so I started swinging that hammer and I swung

00:36:49.480 --> 00:36:52.519
so hard and I made the tiniest little dent in

00:36:52.519 --> 00:36:56.099
the wall, kept swinging and swinging. And pretty

00:36:56.099 --> 00:36:58.380
soon I was able to chip his name off. But I mean,

00:36:58.460 --> 00:37:01.300
this was little dents that I was not getting

00:37:01.300 --> 00:37:02.619
through that wall. It turns out the wall was

00:37:02.619 --> 00:37:07.619
about three feet thick. So eventually my husband

00:37:07.619 --> 00:37:09.420
and Tony started helping me swing that hammer

00:37:09.420 --> 00:37:14.699
too. And it was a long time. but my husband finally

00:37:14.699 --> 00:37:16.780
swung the hammer and there was a hole in the

00:37:16.780 --> 00:37:18.699
wall and we could see through to the other side.

00:37:19.219 --> 00:37:21.440
And we cheered like a mountain had just moved

00:37:21.440 --> 00:37:25.239
into the ocean. It was so exciting. But all three

00:37:25.239 --> 00:37:27.920
of us had the same instinct to go to the room

00:37:27.920 --> 00:37:30.639
on the other side of the wall and look back through

00:37:30.639 --> 00:37:33.900
the hole. And when we did that, the hole was

00:37:33.900 --> 00:37:37.320
small. It was like perfect heart shape on the

00:37:37.320 --> 00:37:39.699
wall. But on the other side of the wall, there

00:37:39.699 --> 00:37:43.059
was about a six foot by six foot section of wall

00:37:43.059 --> 00:37:47.800
that had just crumbled. And it was like, to me,

00:37:47.940 --> 00:37:50.780
that moment was my healing moment. It was like

00:37:50.780 --> 00:37:52.679
God saying, you know what, you didn't make a

00:37:52.679 --> 00:37:56.500
chip in the wall 35 years ago, but now you're

00:37:56.500 --> 00:37:58.539
letting friends help, you're letting family help,

00:37:58.559 --> 00:38:01.059
you've gotten godly counsel, you're doing the

00:38:01.059 --> 00:38:03.440
hard work, and it feels like you're only making

00:38:03.440 --> 00:38:05.579
a chip in the wall at a time, but look at what

00:38:05.579 --> 00:38:07.480
I've been doing on the other side of the wall.

00:38:09.550 --> 00:38:12.849
destroyed that wall. And I think that just speaks

00:38:12.849 --> 00:38:15.429
to who God is when we feel like we're not getting

00:38:15.429 --> 00:38:17.570
anywhere in life and we're just chipping away

00:38:17.570 --> 00:38:19.349
at things and we don't know he could be doing

00:38:19.349 --> 00:38:22.889
this huge work on the other side of the wall,

00:38:23.230 --> 00:38:24.889
you know, tearing that wall down, making room

00:38:24.889 --> 00:38:28.269
for a new masterpiece. To me, that was the ultimate

00:38:28.269 --> 00:38:31.349
healing moment for me to know that God never

00:38:31.349 --> 00:38:34.280
forgot. He knew who the guy was. He knew where

00:38:34.280 --> 00:38:36.519
he was. He knew where I was. He didn't leave

00:38:36.519 --> 00:38:39.460
me at any point in those 35 years. And he still

00:38:39.460 --> 00:38:41.960
has plans. He's still working. Wow. That is so

00:38:41.960 --> 00:38:43.679
good. Well, you know, that whole experience,

00:38:44.500 --> 00:38:48.480
that whole healing experience brought more changes

00:38:48.480 --> 00:38:52.079
into your life. So share about the new, you shared

00:38:52.079 --> 00:38:54.460
a little bit, but share about the new adventures

00:38:54.460 --> 00:38:57.079
God opened up for you to make. I mean, now you're

00:38:57.079 --> 00:38:58.599
making a significant difference in the lives

00:38:58.599 --> 00:39:00.829
of others. That couldn't have happened without

00:39:00.829 --> 00:39:02.570
your healing, right? It couldn't have happened

00:39:02.570 --> 00:39:04.190
without my healing. You're right. And God opened

00:39:04.190 --> 00:39:07.250
those doors, too. So I'm not working as the director

00:39:07.250 --> 00:39:08.929
of worship ministries anymore. Remember, I said

00:39:08.929 --> 00:39:10.869
I felt called to ministry, but I didn't know

00:39:10.869 --> 00:39:12.690
what it would look like. And I think what God

00:39:12.690 --> 00:39:14.510
was doing was saying, yeah, you are called to

00:39:14.510 --> 00:39:19.150
ministry. Let's get ready. And so I became an

00:39:19.150 --> 00:39:21.550
EMDR certified therapist. I already was a licensed

00:39:21.550 --> 00:39:23.809
counselor, but I went back into private practice

00:39:23.809 --> 00:39:26.530
and I work specifically with trauma survivors

00:39:26.530 --> 00:39:30.920
now, which has been Just wonderful. God has opened

00:39:30.920 --> 00:39:33.260
the doors for me to work with wonderful people.

00:39:33.619 --> 00:39:35.840
But he also opened doors for me to start writing

00:39:35.840 --> 00:39:38.980
and speaking. And I'm speaking all over the country

00:39:38.980 --> 00:39:41.619
now, just letting people know that healing is

00:39:41.619 --> 00:39:43.980
possible, even when the world doesn't offer a

00:39:43.980 --> 00:39:48.519
happy ending. And I've written my book, The Trauma

00:39:48.519 --> 00:39:51.780
Tree. And I'm working with legislators, both

00:39:51.780 --> 00:39:55.400
in Lansing and in Washington, DC. And we're really

00:39:55.400 --> 00:39:58.360
chipping away at the wall that stands between

00:40:00.269 --> 00:40:03.150
prosecuting perpetrators. Well Lisa, what truths

00:40:03.150 --> 00:40:06.110
have you gleaned over your journey that you can

00:40:06.110 --> 00:40:07.750
share with us? You've shared a few, but is there

00:40:07.750 --> 00:40:10.989
anything else you want to share with us? I think

00:40:10.989 --> 00:40:14.710
it's important to keep in mind that God, He knows

00:40:14.710 --> 00:40:17.929
everything, right? He doesn't forget a thing.

00:40:19.570 --> 00:40:23.750
And again, you know, I was chipping away at things,

00:40:24.250 --> 00:40:27.829
but He was doing Far more than I could I never

00:40:27.829 --> 00:40:30.530
thought I would ever get a call saying they identified

00:40:30.530 --> 00:40:33.849
that guy right that in itself was miraculous

00:40:33.849 --> 00:40:38.409
I Think reading that book by Charles Stanley,

00:40:39.030 --> 00:40:40.989
you know and just finding out that brokenness

00:40:40.989 --> 00:40:43.789
can lead to blessings You know, honestly our

00:40:43.789 --> 00:40:46.989
message is our mess is his message. We've probably

00:40:46.989 --> 00:40:51.730
heard that before but God can use anything in

00:40:51.730 --> 00:40:55.219
our life And honestly, if I could go back and

00:40:55.219 --> 00:40:58.960
change things, I wouldn't change things because

00:40:58.960 --> 00:41:06.000
God used that horrific incident to make me equipped

00:41:06.000 --> 00:41:09.940
to be a therapist and to teach me that I have

00:41:09.940 --> 00:41:12.179
this story that other people can hear and learn

00:41:12.179 --> 00:41:16.500
about Jesus through that story. And so... It

00:41:16.500 --> 00:41:18.059
gives you a lot of credibility with others who

00:41:18.059 --> 00:41:21.030
are struggling. Yeah. Yeah. And remember, my

00:41:21.030 --> 00:41:23.489
whole question was, can I ever be a credible

00:41:23.489 --> 00:41:26.369
witness again? And God said, yes, and I have

00:41:26.369 --> 00:41:31.530
a plan for you. And so I would say, you know,

00:41:31.590 --> 00:41:37.630
that's just, I don't use the word survivor to

00:41:37.630 --> 00:41:40.230
when I refer to people who have experienced sexual

00:41:40.230 --> 00:41:43.429
violence. Because I remember people calling me

00:41:43.429 --> 00:41:46.030
a survivor and me feeling like, I don't feel

00:41:46.030 --> 00:41:48.079
like I'm surviving at all. And a lot of people

00:41:48.079 --> 00:41:54.139
don't survive. But today, I'm a survivor. And

00:41:54.139 --> 00:41:59.019
I have survived. I have healed. And I know it's

00:41:59.019 --> 00:42:01.139
possible. And I know it's possible for others,

00:42:01.599 --> 00:42:05.400
too. And God needed to reveal that to me so that

00:42:05.400 --> 00:42:07.780
I could walk with others on their path to healing.

00:42:08.480 --> 00:42:11.539
Yeah. Well, finally, Lisa, as we close, is there

00:42:11.539 --> 00:42:14.739
a woman of the Bible whose story has really impacted

00:42:14.739 --> 00:42:16.659
your life or helped you in some way? The woman

00:42:16.659 --> 00:42:21.079
at the well. I imagine a lot of people can identify

00:42:21.079 --> 00:42:23.099
with a woman at the well, but, you know, she

00:42:23.099 --> 00:42:27.880
had been divorced. She was... We don't know her

00:42:27.880 --> 00:42:30.659
circumstances. When we hear about her being divorced

00:42:30.659 --> 00:42:32.480
and she's living with a man who's not her husband,

00:42:32.619 --> 00:42:35.480
and we can make a lot of assumptions, but...

00:42:35.530 --> 00:42:38.269
Who knows why she was divorced? What happened

00:42:38.269 --> 00:42:40.969
in her life? We don't know. We don't know that.

00:42:42.429 --> 00:42:44.570
And despite the fact that I think she had been

00:42:44.570 --> 00:42:48.309
married five times, was living with a man, who

00:42:48.309 --> 00:42:52.050
did God use to be his witness? Right? He told

00:42:52.050 --> 00:42:54.449
her who he was, and she went and told her whole

00:42:54.449 --> 00:42:56.889
town, God knows everything about me, just like

00:42:56.889 --> 00:42:59.110
he did. He knows everything about me and my story.

00:42:59.880 --> 00:43:03.340
And she spread the word of Jesus. And that's

00:43:03.340 --> 00:43:05.619
what I want. I want to be that kind of witness

00:43:05.619 --> 00:43:07.920
for Jesus. Well, Lisa, thank you so much for

00:43:07.920 --> 00:43:11.559
sharing. And friends, Lisa's story is a vivid

00:43:11.559 --> 00:43:15.440
reminder that while our world is very, very broken,

00:43:15.880 --> 00:43:19.280
God is faithful. She mentioned the verse in Psalms

00:43:19.280 --> 00:43:22.019
that declares, I remain confident of this. I

00:43:22.019 --> 00:43:23.940
will see the goodness of the Lord in the land

00:43:23.940 --> 00:43:25.960
of the living. And friend, that promise isn't

00:43:25.960 --> 00:43:28.969
just for Lisa, it's for you too. No matter what

00:43:28.969 --> 00:43:32.809
pain or difficulty you face, you can hold on

00:43:32.809 --> 00:43:34.809
to the assurance that God's goodness will break

00:43:34.809 --> 00:43:38.269
through even here in this life, this earthly

00:43:38.269 --> 00:43:41.309
life. But before we close, Lisa, would you take

00:43:41.309 --> 00:43:43.050
a moment and pray for our listening friends?

00:43:43.429 --> 00:43:46.909
I would love to do that. Lord Jesus, whoever's

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listening today, I'm sure that they've had dark

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times in their life. And so I just am going to

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ask that you would surround everyone who can

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hear these words with your love and with your

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healing. And just make clear, Lord, that you

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don't forget anything. You are there through

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it all. You don't cause it. You don't cause pain

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in our life. But we live in a fallen world and

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sometimes bad things happen. And God, I really

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believe that you are right there with us, maybe

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even weeping with us when those things happen.

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But God, I would just pray that you would let

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each person know healing is possible, even when

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it seems there's no happy ending. Want people

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to know that there is a pathway to healing and

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that you are that pathway Jesus And so I just

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ask that you would bless each person listening

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bless them with the healing bless them with with

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the knowledge that nothing in life is wasted

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Lord that even our worst moments can be used

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for his glory if we let them and And if there's

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somebody who's thinking, you know, maybe I need

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to do something with my story Lord encourage

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their heart today because Scripture does call

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us to comfort others with the same comfort that

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we've received. And I feel like that's what I've

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been called to do. I feel like that's what a

00:45:02.119 --> 00:45:03.800
lot of the people I work with have been called

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to do. The critical thing is that we have to

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heal first. So I ask that you would bring people

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on a healing journey, and once they know you're

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healing, that they would share it with others,

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Lord Jesus. I praise you and I thank you for

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being at the center of my life. In Jesus' name.

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Amen. Well, friend, as you go, I want to speak

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a blessing over you based on Lamentations 3,

00:45:25.469 --> 00:45:29.070
22 and 23. Because of the Lord's great love,

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you are not consumed. His compassions never fail,

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and His mercies are new for you every morning.

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So may you experience the fullness of God's shalom,

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His peace that's not just the quelling of anxiety,

00:45:43.789 --> 00:45:47.130
but its complete well -being, wholeness, and

00:45:47.130 --> 00:45:49.900
restoration. And friends, don't forget, you can

00:45:49.900 --> 00:45:52.239
visit hergodstory .org for today's show notes,

00:45:52.739 --> 00:45:54.880
all the scriptures we talked about, and a free

00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:56.840
six -week devotional on Women of the Bible to

00:45:56.840 --> 00:45:59.420
strengthen your faith. We also have a 12 -week

00:45:59.420 --> 00:46:02.780
devotional available for just $12, and all proceeds

00:46:02.780 --> 00:46:05.059
go to our Widow and Orphan Fund, helping meet

00:46:05.059 --> 00:46:08.139
real needs around the world. If you need prayer,

00:46:08.340 --> 00:46:11.659
please reach out. You are not alone. You can

00:46:11.659 --> 00:46:15.710
call or text anytime. Our prayer line, That's

00:46:15.710 --> 00:46:20.710
24 -7 prayer line at 855 -459 -CARE or email

00:46:20.710 --> 00:46:23.789
us anytime at prayer at somebodycares .org. We'd

00:46:23.789 --> 00:46:27.070
be honored to pray with you. If you've been ministered

00:46:27.070 --> 00:46:29.050
to by Lisa's story, be sure to check out other

00:46:29.050 --> 00:46:31.869
inspiring episodes too. And until next time,

00:46:32.110 --> 00:46:34.590
keep trusting God because he is still writing

00:46:34.590 --> 00:46:37.750
your story. Her God Story is a ministry of Somebody

00:46:37.750 --> 00:46:40.349
Cares America and International. To find out

00:46:40.349 --> 00:46:43.269
more about or support the ministry, go to somebodycares

00:46:43.269 --> 00:46:43.969
.org.