Finding Gifts in the Wilderness, episode 88 (rebroadcast)

0:00 If you love a prodigal, you can discover help and hope for your wilderness journey right here at When You Love a Prodigal and also help and hope for your own life journey. Today we will begin a series on the amazing gifts we can discover in our prodigal wilderness. You say gifts in the wilderness. I don't think there are any gifts there. You certainly don't expect to find one of your best gifts ever when you are wandering through a wilderness. A walk in the wilderness might be lovely if you are a nature lover and you keep your eyes open.

0:43 You can discover some real gems, colorful creatures, spectacular plants, encounters with startling animals, and astounding arrays of colors and shapes, underwater, hidden waterfalls. And a walk in the wilderness could also be frightening and full of surprises that turn out to be dangerous. Oh, snakes, spiders, poisonous plants, wild animals. That experience is more like the wilderness we know as lovers of prodigals. Among that wilderness journey, you may experience fear, anger, frustration, doubt, depression, desperation, hopelessness.

1:33 You encounter people and situations you would never have known nor want to know. When I remember the things that we went through, it was a whole new world that we got exposed to. Every way you try to help him or her towards a safe and productive life fails, and you often feel like a failure. But if you keep your eyes and your mind and heart open, you will discover treasures that you never anticipated. Loving a prodigal can introduce you to deep needs in hurting people, broken families, broken systems, the needs that they have.

2:16 Depth of empathy and compassion that you have never felt before, and opportunities to offer comfort and love. I know my husband experienced a lot of that as he watched our son and encountered others and his compassion for them grew. Loving a prodigal will also open doors of understanding and tenderness toward the wanderer you love. And though we may have started out with understanding and tenderness, sometimes the journey is so full of conflict and so painful that tenderness and understanding have disappeared.

3:04 But if you pay attention, it will open your ears and you can hear the heart cries of this person that's causing you so much pain. It will help you learn life lessons that you have hoped your prodigal will grasp. Sometimes what they need, we also need at least a certain degree of. You will be able to recognize old patterns of relating and communicating and adopt some new approaches that will transform your future with your loved one. There's more, though. In this series, we will be wilderness explorers, discovering seven invaluable gifts to transform our lives as well as our prodigals.

3:55 By the time we are done, you may find yourself on your knees in gratitude to God. And the best gift you will find in this wilderness journey will be your prodigal. He or she will be the channel through which God does a beautiful work in you and will lay the groundwork for a rich new relationship with your prodigal someday to come. So let's begin this search that will enable each of us to say, thank God for this gift too wonderful for words that we are told about in 2 Corinthians 9.

4:36 So the first gift that we're going to look at is the gift of mercy. What was the last thing that your prodigal did that really exasperated you, lied to you, stole from you, drove high or intoxicated, moved in with a girlfriend or boyfriend, refused to go to school, did something foolish and dangerous, ended up in jail. Refused to communicate with you. What was your response? Angry words, accusations, threats, bribes.

5:20 These are the kinds of responses that we usually have. But let's look at it from another way. What was the last thing you did that might have saddened God? Probably not the obviously destructive things your prodigal might have done, but God has saddened by many of our choices in response to our loved ones or to other events and circumstances in our lives. Responses like anger, hurtful words, harsh punishments or fear, deceit, lack of kindness or compassion, unloving attitude, impatience.

6:02 It could be a long list. And what was God's response when you responded that way? Think of Jesus' response to people in Scripture, such as the woman at the well that he, instead of condemning her, he offered her living water or the thief on the cross who deserved to be there who said so himself, and yet he said, Today you will be with me in paradise. And then there's the woman who was caught in adultery. The story is in John 8. The woman's accuser surely had set up the caught in the act, shaming of this woman, dragged from the bed, apparently, and thrust at the feet of Jesus.

6:53 She awaited his condemnation and her own death. Jesus was quiet, wrote on the ground. Then he said, Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her. She cringed, anticipating, waiting for the stones to come. As she heard nothing but the sound of stones dropping to the ground and feet shuffling away. Woman, where are they? Jesus asked, Has no one condemned you? No one, sir, the amazed woman replied.

7:36 Then neither do I condemn you, Jesus declared. Go now and leave your life of sin. Jesus showed mercy to her, and she hadn't even asked for it. And you and I, surely we too, often find ourselves crying out to God for mercy, as David did after his sin with Bathsheba. Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love, according to your great compassion, blot out my transgressions. Psalm 51 is really good.

8:17 We are grateful our God is like the merciful Father in Luke 15. As the Father's prodigal wanderer returned, before he could even speak his repentance, the Father ran to him, threw his arms around him, kissed him, put a cloak and a ring on him and threw a party. For God loves mercy. And one of Josh's great gifts to me is my ability to grasp that truth. Our God is willing to immerse us in his mercy. Ephesians 2 tells us, But because of his great love for us, God who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ, even when we were dead in transgressions, it is by grace you have been saved.

9:12 Yes, God is opposed to sin, and sin generates consequences, some of which are the natural result of choices made, others that we impose. But our primary response should be one that flows out of the love and grace that we ourselves have received. Even as we have been immersed in the mercy of our God, so should we give mercy to our prodigals. We should be less like the Pharisees dragging in the woman caught in adultery and more like the very wronged Father who ran to his prodigal son with welcome and mercy.

9:57 May we live with this truth. Mercy triumphs over judgment. So think about it. Does that mean there are no consequences? No, it doesn't mean there are no consequences. But how we approach them and how we respond to our loved ones is with the mercy that God has given us. So think about this. When has mercy been given to you? How did that affect you? How might you extend more mercy to your prodigal?

10:39 Next week we will consider two more amazing gifts to discover in the prodigal wilderness. But this week, practice mercy. You'll surprise yourself, anyone watching, and especially your loved one. Notice them in the mercy of God that's flowing through you. God bless you.