Giving Thanks Opens Hearts, Minds and Doors (episode 40)

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Today, on the When You Love a Prodigal podcast, you will receive gifts that come to you as

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you learn to give thanks.

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Gifts for you are coming today.

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If you love a prodigal, which you likely might if you're listening to this podcast, you can

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discover help and hope for your wilderness journey right here at When You Love a Prodigal,

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and also help and hope on your life journey as well.

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As you listen today, and I'm so glad that you're here, I'm going to encourage you to

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ask God to show you which of the gifts that I'm going to mention are the ones that you

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need, maybe just one, and you can say, yes, I want that gift.

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Write about it, write it down, and then write to me and tell me what gift you felt God had

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for you and even how that's going and how he's used it in your life.

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Our prodigal's grandfather was dying.

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Our son is adopted, and this is his birth grandfather.

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Noah was the most important man in Josh's life.

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He was the one who was there in his early years before we adopted him.

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He taught him to fish, to handle a boat, to love the ocean.

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He took him to karate and to baseball.

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He just did everything with him.

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But then when the county had taken him from his mother and was looking for a home for

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him, the grandparents said, we're already raising his half-sister.

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We just are too old and too tired to take him.

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And so he ended up with us.

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But Papa never left his life.

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He was always there, very involved with him in the years that followed.

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And then Josh had a lot of ups and downs, hard times, bad times, and better times.

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And he was in a better place in his life when Papa became quite ill and was growing weaker

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and weaker.

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Josh took off from his job to be with him.

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He wept and wept.

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He took long walks on the beach, pouring out his pain and his anger to God.

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He told me, I know I need to give thanks even in this, but I'm having a hard time saying

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thank you to God.

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Giving thanks had been an emphasis in our family, and he'd finally begun to make it

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his.

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But Josh was so devastated at his grandfather's decline.

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And then we were sure that he was so out of control over it that when Papa died, that

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there was a good chance Josh would take his own life.

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But when it happened, this is what Josh did.

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He helped the man from the funeral home, Carrie, get his grandfather out to the van where they

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would take him to prepare him.

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Then he cleaned up all the area where his grandfather had been for weeks.

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And he planned the funeral with his grandmother.

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At the funeral, he got up and he shared what his papa had meant to him.

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He said he wanted to become a good man like his grandfather.

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He wanted to make him proud.

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And he thanked God at the memorial service.

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And then again at our Thanksgiving dinner a few weeks later, he thanked God for what

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a wonderful grandfather he had had.

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And even though I missed him, it never entered his mind that he was going to take his life,

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having lost the most important person in his life.

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Giving thanks has been one of the most transforming practices I have learned in my life.

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And in our long, prodigal wilderness, it was a significant teacher to me.

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I learned about giving thanks.

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And now it's almost Thanksgiving, at least in our country, in the U.S.

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For many of us, Thanksgiving is a hard time, especially in the past couple of years.

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We might not have lost a loved one, but most of us know someone who has.

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There are always family tensions, hurtful memories, loneliness, all of that when you

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come together, especially as you have more adults or young adults.

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It can be a really challenging time to enjoy your holidays together.

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But having a prodigal in the family or in the home can be especially difficult.

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All this can make it really hard, almost impossible, to be thankful.

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And so you do Thanksgiving, and you're not thankful.

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But it is exactly what we need to do.

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We need to give thanks.

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Again, one of the most important, helpful, life-changing truths that I have learned.

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God is so clear in Scripture.

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Two verses I can mention, though there are others, says in Philippians 4, we are to pray

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about everything with thanksgiving.

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I think usually when we pray about everything in our lives, we're just praying what we wish

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God would do.

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And He's saying we need to do it with thanksgiving.

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And then this is Paul speaking again in 1 Thessalonians 5.

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He says, in all things, give thanks.

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Why would God say that?

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Everything?

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All things?

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How is that possible?

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He says it because He knows that giving thanks is the fastest way to bring needed change

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to us.

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The growth that we need, the attitudes that need to be better, all of that.

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Giving thanks is the key.

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So let me tell you about these gifts that giving thanks will give to you.

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First, when we say thank you, Lord, almost immediately our focus changes.

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Instead of centering on the pain caused by my unwelcome circumstances, especially by

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a prodigal who's making some bad decisions, instead of focusing on that, I center on God.

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I focus on Him.

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I invite Him to give me His perspective on this difficult time.

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Sometimes it's barely perceptible, but it's there.

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There is a small shift from fear to faith.

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That just happens almost immediately for me if in a hard time I say thank you, Lord, He

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just changes my perspective.

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But He goes further.

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There's more.

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Another thing that happens when we say thank you, Lord, it's as though we are saying to

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Him, I believe you are God and I believe you are good.

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It doesn't feel like it right now, but Your Word assures me it is true.

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I have known it to be true in the past and I choose to believe it now.

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The scriptures help us to recall and again believe that God is good.

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In Jeremiah 32 we get this amazing promise, I will make an everlasting covenant with them.

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I will never stop doing good to them.

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Did you hear that?

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God said, I will never stop doing good to them.

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Bless to you and me, to our prodigal, to the other family members we'll be with.

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I will inspire them to fear me so that they will never turn away from me.

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I will rejoice in doing them good and will assuredly plant them in this land with all

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my heart and soul.

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I just love the passion that God has for us and what He wants to do in our lives and how

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good He is.

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Psalm 34 we read, taste and see that the Lord is good.

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Blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him.

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And then in Psalm 86, you Lord are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call

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to you.

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And then in Psalm 100, for the Lord is good and His love endures forever.

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His faithfulness continues through all generations.

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And so when I can say thank you, I'm recognizing that God is good and I can trust Him therefore

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in what He's doing in my life or the lives of those I love.

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It's a huge thing that changes your perspective.

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We seem terrible, but God is good and He loves us.

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And He can do something about this.

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Even in the painful time, He's working.

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When we say thank you, Lord, we are also expressing our trust in God and His trustworthiness,

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even in tough times.

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That step of faith and obedience in the midst of my fear and pain does a couple of wonderful

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things.

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First of all, my mind and my emotions quiet.

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They settle, maybe even relax.

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And I began to experience peace in the midst of turmoil, hope when there seems to be none.

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So not only will I understand that God is good and loves me and therefore I can trust

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Him, saying thank you just brings peace to me and gives me hope for the future and what

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you're going to do.

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And in ways that I don't fully understand, saying thank you begins to open doors.

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It's as if those words said in my hesitant trust give God a key to us, a key to our hearts

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and our minds.

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And with that key, He begins to unlock doors that have been locked by our pain, our anger,

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our fear, our resistance.

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We begin to get glimpses of answers to our prayers, of more steps forward than backward,

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of new attitudes, and occasionally of outright transformation in the lives of our prodigals,

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those we love, others that we pray for, and most importantly, in our own lives.

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God says if you'll say thank you, I'll show you what that can open up for your life, in

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your attitudes, in your mental health and emotional health, and your peace and joy.

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Josh, our prodigal, really learned to say that.

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He learned to give thanks.

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And it's made a huge difference in my life as well.

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I consider it one of the two most important things in my walk with God is giving thanks.

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So my encouragement to you for this Thanksgiving season that we are entering is to do that.

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Give thanks.

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Oh, yes, at the table you might have a little piece of paper that everyone gets one and

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it gives a question, what are you thankful for?

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But I'm talking about more than that.

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How do we do that?

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Every day, name or write down at least one thing you are thankful for.

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Can't think of anything?

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Well, start with your own life and relationship with God.

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What are you thankful for in the past in your life?

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Still can't get there?

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Ask a friend or family member what they're thankful for.

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That might stimulate an idea for you.

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Look around your home or your neighborhood for something that brings you joy and for

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which you're thankful.

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If you can begin to identify things you're thankful for, then it can become more of a

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habit, a way of remembering to say thank you, Lord.

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Try adding one more specific thank you to a list each day.

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But if only one is all you can come up with, you know, God will receive that and he will

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still begin the work he's going to do in your life because you said thank you.

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Now, I hope that you've written down something that you think will help you be able to give

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thanks even when your prodigal makes another bad choice or when things don't go the way

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you want.

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Be sure to write and tell me about that because then I can pray for you.

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Maybe I can send you something that would be helpful and I'll have that to share with

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others.

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I won't identify you.

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Just the things that you have learned.

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Give thanks about everything.

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Pray about everything with thanksgiving.

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God says, I have gifts for you.

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Your life will change.

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You will like how you're able to live and who you are even better because you have learned

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to give thanks.

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It has immediate results, I promise.

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Even in the hard things, even as Josh struggled to say thank you when his grandfather was

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dying, but he got there and God gave him not only peace in the midst of it, but he gave

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him new resolve for his life.

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Giving thanks is one of the most important things we can do.

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Let me give you a word about the next two weeks on When You Love a Prodigal.

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This is the first of two episodes on giving thanks.

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Next week, we'll be talking about cultivating a grateful heart so it even becomes just welling

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up from inside you.

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It's not just learning to give thanks, but it's a heart that's grateful.

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I hope that will bless you.

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Then the following week, we have an interview that you're going to love.

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We will be talking about with Dina Yohe, who's the author of the book, You're Not Alone,

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her journey with her prodigal and what she's learned from it and the ministry God's given

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her.

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The prodigal, Renee, is the inspiration behind the group to write Love on Her Arms.

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She's had quite a journey, a lot of very hard things, and a lot of things she and her family

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have learned as a result of Renee's very difficult journey.

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You'll learn a lot about that in our interview in two weeks.

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Next week, Cultivating a Grateful Heart, the week after that, the title of that one is

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Can You Love the Holidays When You Love a Prodigal?

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I think you'll find out it's possible.

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God bless you.