Joy 1-Joy in the Hard Journey, episode 103

0:00 If you love a prodigal, you can discover help and hope for your wilderness journey right here at When You Love a Prodigal podcast. And also help and hope for your own life journey. As I share, as God opened your mind and heart about how to have joy in this challenging journey, be sure to jot it down so you can put them into practice. This week we are beginning the first of four devotional studies leading up to the June 2nd Worldwide Prodigal Prayer Day.

0:43 I will give you a little bit of information on that at the end. Let me tell a more personal story to start with. My husband, Steve, has been a daily source of joy for me for more than 50 years, and especially for the 47 years that we were married. Daily he made me coffee and kept my cup filled, told me he loves me every day, sometimes several times a day, praised my cooking, told me I was beautiful, assured me that I can do anything that God gives me to do. He even washed the dishes and the laundry, paid the bills, rubbed my back, and always believed in me and encouraged me.

1:34 He was such a source of joy. But six months ago, Steve left me. It was not his choice, but God's. And complications from a cancer treatment ended his earthly life, but he joyfully moved to his new heavenly home. Now, I miss him terribly, but how can I not rejoice that he is with Jesus and free from the growing troubles his body was facing? Did I say rejoice? Oh yes. As great a loss as this has been for me and my children and my grandchildren, as often as tears come, I can still rejoice.

2:24 And that's one reason why I believe God can give us joy, even abundant joy, even as we navigate the hard journey of loving a prodigal. So what gives you joy? For most of us, joy and happiness are kind of synonyms. So the things that make us happy often provide joy in our lives. Often what brings us joy are wonderful relationships we have, like family, a spouse, children, grandchildren, our neighbors, some church friends, some co-workers.

3:04 The people in our lives can be the happiest parts of our lives. Other sources of happiness might be a sense of purpose, meaningful work, a nice home, good health, fun and refreshing activities, and even when your team wins the championship, whatever sport you're into. But then there are the realities that seem to steal our joy away. The loss of a job, financial challenges, a scary diagnosis like my husband had, betrayal by friends, interpersonal conflicts, and for us, the pain and challenge of a prodigal, of a loved one making destructive life choices or causing chaos in the family or even rejecting their relationship with you.

4:04 Our God tells us we can have joy in all those bad events I just mentioned, even when my husband died or when your loved one breaks your heart for the first time or many times. Our theme verse for these four sessions on joy is James 1-2. James has the audacity to say, consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of any kind. James calls us to make a choice, to consider, which means to acknowledge, recognize, regard, think about the trials of our lives as pure joy.

4:58 Seriously, pure joy? Not just grudging joy? So James goes on to remind us of some gifts we receive from those trials. He says, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. And then he says, let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. Now, probably perseverance hasn't been on your list of desired gifts, not mine for sure.

5:39 Though we must admit it helps us get through hard times. I think perseverance has been one of my most important gifts. Just look at, he says, is the result of when we persevere, when we stick with it, when we don't quit or give up. We become mature and complete and we lack nothing. I bet you've never thought about that. Perseverance is a gift that helps us go through life and all the hard parts of life, including a prodigal. And we'll have everything we need. We will not lack.

6:20 And therefore, we can choose to rejoice. We can consider it joyful as we go through those things. Yet, even as God calls us to perseverance and joy on a hard journey, he also invites us to be honest with him. To express your fears and feelings, to ask challenging questions, to lament. So sometimes we think that we are showing lack of faith if we question God, if we tell him we don't like what he's doing to us or in our lives.

7:02 But he's willing to listen. He wants to be in a conversation with us about what we're going through. And this is called lament or lamentation. So what is lament? Well, it's a prayer expressing sorrow or pain or confusion or just our disappointment at a great loss. And lament should be the chief way Christians process grief in God's presence. Instead of just hanging out over here complaining, he says, come on, let's talk.

7:42 And we can tell him what we're thinking. Almost a third of the book of Psalms and the entire book of Lamentations are concerned with lament. Like every other emotion, God wants to hear about our pain. He wants us to lament. So I'm going to just read you one psalm, not too long, from the sons of Korah. And this is Psalm 42. And I want you to recognize and see he's being very honest. He's saying what he's not liking. He's asking hard questions.

8:23 And then he turns around and rejoices. And it kind of repeats. So just listen as I read, you will probably be familiar with this. As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while people say to me all day long, where is your God? These things I remember as I pour out my soul, how I used to go to the house of God under the protection of the mighty one, with shouts of joy and praise among the festive throng.

9:07 Why my soul are you downcast? Why are you so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. And once again he says, my soul is downcast within me, therefore I will remember you from the land of the Jordan, the heights of Mount Hermon and Mount Mazar. Deep calls to deep, in the roar of your waterfalls, all your waves and breakers have swept over me. That's what it feels like sometimes, isn't it? It's like we're being drowned by the sadness and the hurt and the pain and confusion that we're experiencing.

9:53 And he says, by day the Lord directs his love, at night his song is with me. He's there, he's listening, and he's caring what you're going through. And I say to God, my rock, why have you forgotten me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by an enemy? My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me, saying to me all day long, where is your God? Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? And I say to my soul, put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

10:42 Do you see the psalmist back and forth, pouring out his fears, his concern, his lament, and then turning right around and praising God and finding joy in the midst of that hard time? As you can see, God welcomes our praise, and he also welcomes our stories of our pain. He receives our gratitude and also our questions. After Steve's death, I had a lot of questions.

11:23 Answers included scriptural promises and reminders, but also words like trust me, wait, oh yeah, and persevere. But God was also kind to give me almost audible answers to some of my questions. These two I'm going to share with you. They've been the most important and helpful to me. I said to him early after Steve was gone, how will I live without him, Lord? And God said, I will be with you.

12:03 And when I asked it again the next night, that's when I always ask those questions, was it night? And he said the same thing, I'm still with you. I will always be with you. But this one is the most special. I said, why did he have to leave now? And his response, God's response, has been an ongoing source of joy for me. God said, I wanted to be kind to him because he knew what the problems that he would face if he continued trying to fight this cancer that he had, which really didn't have a treatment that worked.

12:52 And he said, I wanted to be kind to him. And I say, how can I argue with that? How can I do anything but rejoice that God chose kindness over what he would learn from persevering? And he does that sometimes, and I'm so grateful. So summing up this first devotional on joy and the hard journey, God calls us to consider it pure joy when the journey is hard, and as we do, we will find valuable life-giving gifts.

13:34 But he also invites us to tell him how hard it is, how much it hurts, how confused we are to ask our deep and honest questions. And in the process, as he hears us, as he responds through his word, whispering to us in the night, through the good words of others, he will also give us joy. Next week, we will discover more about how in the world we can consider it pure joy when we are encountering hard trials, especially those that come from our beloved prodigals.

14:18 So let me ask you, have you found any joy on your hard journey? What has helped you to experience some joy and to be able to do something that gives you joy? I hope you will discover some joy in the two songs that I have linked in the show notes. Each of these four weeks, I will have two songs for you in the show notes that I hope will bless you, encourage you, and give you joy, even in the midst of a hard journey. Remember that we are moving toward the June 2nd Worldwide Prodigal Prayer Day.

15:01 Is your prodigal's name on the list? What are you praying for? If it is, you don't have to do anything. We don't take them off. It's already there. But if you have a prodigal and you would like for the hundreds, thousands around the world who will be praying on that day to pray specifically for the name of your loved one, we'll be glad to do that. You just need to follow the directions in the show notes to give us your name so that we can include yours. And maybe you know some others. A lot of time we do, don't we? We know who else is going through this. And we would love to include them in prayer for their loved one.

15:43 God bless you.