Loving Like Jesus, episode 100 (rebroadcast)

0:00 If you love a prodigal, you can discover help and hope for your wilderness journey right here at When You Love a Prodigal and also help and hope for your own life journey. It is amazing to me that this is episode 100. I had never even listened to a podcast when I was asked to do this When You Love a Prodigal podcast, but my team and my husband said when I was reluctant, you can't turn down this great opportunity God has given you.

0:40 So I said yes. And it has been such a privilege to travel with you on your prodigal wilderness journey, learning with you, hopefully helping and encouraging you. I have been so blessed as I did each podcast as I was reminded of all that God had done in my life and is still and will do again. And how much the hard journey I had with our son is blessing you. Yeah. And a blessing to be able to turn our hard years and our wilderness into words and stories to benefit you and I hope many others.

1:32 And if you want and haven't, you can hear his story. He's there telling it in episode 50. I believe that our highest calling in life with Jesus is to reflect the image of God, the likeness of Jesus to a very hurting world and every person stumbling around in their own prodigal wilderness. And I believe that Jesus gave us the secret for ourselves, for our wanderers and for the world.

2:13 That is love better than coke, better than any other song or person you've heard talking about the importance of love because we're talking about love like Jesus loved. In John 1334, Jesus made this clear and very strong statement, a new command I give you. He says, you've heard commands about loving God with everything in you, but this is a new command that you love one another. Then he adds, as I have loved you, so you must love one another.

2:58 But he didn't stop there. He expanded on what that love looked like in John chapter 15. He says, my command is this, love each other as I have loved you. But then he defines what that love looks like. He says, greater love has no one than this to lay down one's life for one's friends or one's prodigal. Can I do that? Can you, can you love, can we love like Jesus? Well, he knew we couldn't do it on our own, so he provided help.

3:42 He says, going on down in John 14, he says, I will ask the Father and He will give you another advocate to help you and to be with you forever. You know him, for he lives with you and soon when Jesus left, he says, he will be in you. The advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, Jesus says, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you, even to love one another as I have loved you.

4:24 So he said, yes, it's a challenging command, love as Jesus loved, even to the place of laying down our lives. Well, maybe we won't have to do that, but in a sense, when we are loving our prodigals, it is like laying down our lives in so many ways. He gives us the will and the power to do whatever it takes to care for and to win and to love those who are giving us so much trouble.

5:07 So think for a minute, to whom do you want or need to show this kind of love, maybe even for yourself or maybe for your spouse, your children, maybe some other people in your life, but certainly for your prodigal. So as I continue and help us understand what it looks like to live in love like Jesus, keep in mind who you want to focus on, who you want to love like Jesus loved, even though it's not easy. So let's break this tangible.

5:48 Again, well, you need to give your life, probably not, but it's possible. So what are ways we lay down our lives? Well, we give time. In fact, time is a big one for me. My husband would often ask me, could we go do something or could I do something? I would say that's not in my schedule because time was so precious to get things done. Serving. Some people have a gift of serving, so that doesn't count as laying down your life. I'm just joking. But for them, it's easy.

6:30 For some of us, serving is not the gift that we have, and that's a challenge. Sometimes it's listening. You know, our prodigals sometimes yell at us, but sometimes they just want someone to listen. And we usually are so busy thinking about what we're going to say that we don't listen to what they want to say. Maybe all they need is some encouragement, and they'll make some better choices. Gratefully, the apostle Paul joins Jesus and gives us a lot of help, clarifying throughout his letters what it looks like to live and love like Jesus.

7:16 So of course, we go to 1 Corinthians 13. And I know you know it, but I find it helpful to be reminded. So I'm going to just read it very slowly. In each description, let it sink in and maybe ask yourself, how am I doing with this one? So love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud.

7:56 You know, that was a real important one. My husband, who was not a proud person, the Lord called him up on the fact that he was judging our son. And one time, my husband was unhappy with our son, and he was just making bad choices all the time, and he's lazy and he won't work. And God said to him, so, Steve, how big is the gap? Between you and Josh. And Steve thought, it's pretty big. And then he said, and how big is the gap between you and me as far as our pride, for example?

8:44 And Steve says, oh Lord, so much greater. And so it helped him to begin to not judge everything our son did, but to look instead for ways to help him, to encourage him, to love him. Love does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking. Here's one. It is not easily angered. So when was the last time that you were angry with your loved one? Or someone else that God's pointing out that you could love?

9:29 Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. And then Paul adds, love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. So let's pause for a minute. Which of these would be a way you could show love to a hard to love person in your life? Paul has more help for us. Thank you, Paul.

10:09 In Colossians 3, we read this. Or as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, that's, he's talking to us, okay? Where God's people were holy, well, and for sure, we're dearly loved. He says, clothe yourselves, that is, put on. Wear this like clothing, okay? And kindness, humility, gentleness, oh, and then patience again.

10:50 He goes on and says, bear with each other. Forgive one another if any of you have a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on, love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. So as we seek to cooperate with God as he's working in our lives to give us compassion and kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiving, he says it's love that's going to pull that all together.

11:35 So think for a minute about your last conversation or interaction with your prodigal. Did love cover it? And then in Romans 12, Paul gives us more help on what it looks like to love like Jesus. This whole section in a Bible heading is love in action. Love must be sincere, hate what is evil, cling to what is good. Let's see, hate what is evil. That could be the evil that our loved person is doing, but it could also be the attitudes of our heart, but cling to what is good.

12:26 Be devoted to one another in love. Oh, here's a good one. Honor one another above yourselves. Not easy. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor. Keep wanting to grow. Keep wanting to help your loved one to be loved and to grow and become the person God created them to be. Serve the Lord. Be joyful in hope.

13:07 Sometimes living with a prodigal seems to steal joy away from us, but love is going to be joyful increasingly. Patient and affliction. There's that word patient again. Faithful in prayer. Oh, we haven't mentioned that. Probably the next most important, maybe the most important thing we can do for our loved ones is to pray for them. We should pray for ourselves too, since obviously as we're reading through this, we have some areas to grow in, but we can pray for them always. And sometimes we just need to shut up and just go to the Lord and talk to him about them because he's the one who can really do the transformation in them.

14:00 He goes on to say, bless those who persecute you. Bless and do not curse. Speaking of cursing, next week we're going to talk about turning curses into blessings. That sounds almost impossible. I can remember not only one time that Josh would come home drunk and angry and get mad at me, though I hadn't done anything to be part of that. And then he would go out in our front yard and start screaming and yelling and cursing as loud as he could.

14:43 And of course, we had neighbors. And so I'm going out there trying to convince him to come in, and we would talk inside. But he says, don't curse in response. It's so easy when they are saying ugly things for us to let ugly words come out of our mouths. He says, don't do that. He says, rejoice with those who rejoice. Mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Don't be proud. Be willing to associate with people of low position.

15:24 Do not be conceited. So these are pretty high standards that Paul has set for us as he describes what it means to love like Jesus loves. And love is the way that we woo our loved ones back to us, back to the Lord, back to better choices in their lives. In Romans 2.4, it tells us that God says it's not following all the rules that will work. He says, what will work is what I have done.

16:06 I woo people to myself with loving kindness. And that's what God's asking us to do. And again, it's not impossible because he's given us the spirit of God living in us. We have the means to love like that. But now I imagine you're thinking, but my prodigal takes advantage of me if I do those things. They might do that. Yes. And they certainly don't love back. Well, they may say that and act it, but my guess in most cases, there is some love there and we can help to draw it out.

16:53 What my kid needs, my prodigal needs is tough love. And if you've been listening to these podcasts, you know that that's not my favorite approach. Yes, we need to have some standards. We need to have some boundaries for us and our homes and what's allowed. That's okay. But how we tell them that, how we establish those makes all the difference in the world. And that can be done in love. And rather than coming up with anger against them and saying, if you're going to do that, then you're leaving.

17:36 Or if you're going to do that, you're grounded for a year, whatever we might say. If we can come to them even in times of needed correction, if we can come in love, it can make all the difference. As I said two weeks ago in the last episode we did on mercy, love does need courage and it needs some firmness. But even that must be done with love. We have to set those boundaries to find the consequences, but we do it with love and grace. Now, I know you're tired of me saying that maybe, but it is the way Jesus said, love them like I love them and I wooed them with loving kindness.

18:29 Now I confess that I did not always speak and respond with love with my prodigal. But the Lord was patient and faithful as he showed me over and over how much he loved me and my prodigal and assured me that as I let the Holy Spirit fill me and remind me and guide me, I had the power, I had the desire, I had the ways to love like Jesus. Jesus knew we couldn't do it on our own. He said, I'm sending my spirit to live in you and as you let him fill you up and be in control, he will give you what you need to love like Jesus.

19:22 It's Jesus' new command, love as I have loved, but with supernatural power to do it. He had that power and he's given it to us. So take a minute. Ask God where he wants you to grow and learn to love like Jesus, especially to your loved wanderer, then thank him for the help he has promised through the Holy Spirit. Today, choose to pray, to speak, to act with the love of Jesus flowing through you.

20:02 Look for an opportunity to let the love of Jesus flow through you to your prodigal and any other hard to love person in your life. Thanks for celebrating with me on this hundredth episode of the podcast. Why don't you celebrate by telling your friends about it, someone you know with a prodigal. We usually find out about each other, don't we? So let them know about this podcast. You can subscribe so that it comes to you in your email every week, a reminder that the podcast is coming up.

20:47 But mostly seek to live out what God shows you, lots of love flowing through you, grace coming through you. God bless you.