(271) “Finding Meaning in Life in Communist China” with Annie Halberg and Lois Wang

0:00 I walk into the Three -Self Church. It was singing, What a good friend of Jesus. Wow. That choir singing. You know what? I teared, pouring out like rain. I cried for, non -stop crying for three days. Wow. I believe that's born again, you know. I just, everywhere I go, I cried. I just saw the beautiful flower, everything beautiful. God promises in Joel 2 .28 to pour out His Spirit on all humanity. Welcome to Global Outpouring, where we contend for that promise outpouring, we equip for that outpouring so that we may engage in that very outpouring. I'm Philip Buss. And I'm Sharon Buss. Welcome to the podcast today.

0:55 We have with us our special guests, Esther Annie Halberg and her sister Lois. They are from China and they have amazing stories. So we're going to do two episodes with them to bring you their stories. They have just been such a blessing to us. And we want to encourage you to enjoy this as Annie shares her story of finding meaning in life in communist China. We're so glad that you've joined us today. Thank you so much. We would love to hear from you. You can send us an email at feedback at globaloutpouring .org, or you can go to our website, globaloutpouring .net, and you can leave us a comment there. We would love to hear from you. It's really, really empowering to us when you give us some feedback.

1:58 We'd love to hear where you're listening from. We'd love to hear from you if you have something. you need prayer for, if you have an idea that you want us to do a podcast on, we'll take it to the Holy Spirit, see what he gives us. There's so many things on our website that you can enjoy, and we want to make sure, if you haven't already done so, that you have subscribed to our email lists, because that's how we can stay in touch with you. If other forms of communication don't work for some reason, it could happen, it could happen. This is a really good way for us to be able to stay in touch with you. Well, it's a delight to have with us Esther Annie Halberg and Lois Wong, they're sisters. And you came with a whole team from New Zealand and China.

2:45 What an amazing combination even to have. But you're Chinese and you came to New Zealand. That's a story in itself. I don't know how much of the stories we'll be able to tell today, but we've known each other for a number of years, and we really appreciate you coming to the convention. So welcome to the Global Outpouring Podcast. Thank you so much. I'm honored to be here. So I would love to go back to the story of how you got connected to this ministry, how you met Sister Gwen Shaw, our founder. Oh, wow. Yes, I came to the U .S. in 2008. Actually, I worked for another organization. So I was invited to attend the presidential prayer breakfast for Bush. Yeah, he's a prudential preceptor. And then during that break, I just saw one lady came out with me on the wheelchair. And another lady pushed her, so she asked me in Chinese, Are you from Inner Mongolia? I said, yes. I was surprised.

4:04 How do you know that? Then she said, do you know Mongolia Wang Ye? Wang Ye means the Mongolia king. I said, oh, I was born in Mongolia Wang Ye King's Palace. Then she said, wow, you know, she'd given me her name card. And she said, is the one year still alive? I said, no, I even don't know. That name card brought us together. I had to wait for one year, and then I came to Angletown. That year, I experienced brokenness.

4:45 Physically, my ovary was broken. I had three -quarters of my blood poured out. Yeah, I was facing almost death. Physically, spiritually, I got a breakthrough. white skin, and it's like a rebirth, you know. Wow. Yeah, so after that, it took me half a year to restore, you know, my physical body is so weak, I have to drink in the liquid for a month, chicken soup, you know. I got a sister who came from New Zealand to look after me. Gradually, when I was getting better, I was invited to a women's group who studied the 12 tribes of Israel. I was really fascinated. I had been coming from an underground church in New Zealand. I found a Chinese church.

5:41 Always in the church, never heard about the Israel or tribal. So I studied that book. find my first tribe, Zebulun, you know. I said, who is that woman? Grandshaw wrote such a fantastic book, you know. Then I went back home and find out the name card Sister Grandshaw gave to me. I said, oh, that's the same lady I met at the presidential prayer breakfast. Then the Midland people said, wow, you know, she's a very, she's a very anointed woman. He said, you got to meet with her. So everybody started calling, you know, Anton Handmaiden.

6:24 Yeah, so Sister Granshaw said, come here, come here. Yeah, so I made a day I drove to Little Rock. Oh, no, I flew to Little Rock and hired the car. But for me, coming to Angletown, also I had to break through so much because that day was... I was lost so many times. I drove like four or five hours from Little Rock. It's only two and a half hours drive. I don't have GPS. I drove on the mountain, my driving skills. School is not that good. I was so afraid that suddenly the fog, you know, come. I couldn't see anything on the narrow road. I said, oh, my goodness, Lord, help me. I cry out to God. I turned, opened four windows, and it was in November. It was so freezing. Oh, yes. My finger can't move. Anyway, I just heard the Lord said. bring out your wind, fly like an eagle. Wow. I just realized I come to the eagle rock. So finally I arrived. I think Philip, you went to pick me up. And from there, I just came down to the valley. Wow. I feel like a whole new world waiting for me. Wow. It was.

7:45 Yeah. It was like nine o 'clock. She's expecting. me for dinner but I was because I was lost and I tried to find then she sang the song Jesus love you I all know in Chinese I cried I cried Then Sister Grandshasha just told you, record everything Annie said. Oh, wow. I feel so honored. I thought nobody had come here. She always honored me. That makes me feel like, wow, I must be important.

8:29 Then I stayed here for three days, and she began to ask you to take out the old photo album. Oh, yes. Like every day I look at the photo. She shared all the story from the birth, from the baby photo. Until, you know, she was in China, in India, like her whole life. And laying in front of me, I just heard that God said, look, this is your spiritual mother. Beautiful. If I can make her to live a life like that, I can give you the same life. Beautiful, beautiful. Even greater. So I feel I always. feel like I was unworthy, but I was so encouraged. And she gave me her biography book. And yeah, when I returned home, I immediately started reading, even on the airplane. I never read an English book within one week, but that's the only book I read in one week. I read her story about, you know, she took the $10 to go to China, go to Mongolia, go to Alashan. That's my hometown area.

9:38 So I began to realize that I was her prayer fruit, you know. After 20 years, she laid down herself in my hometown. I was born, you know. Yeah, she told me she had poured out so much tea in my hometown, you know. But that, yeah, that's such a dark time and no believer in that. I remember she said when she was there, You know, sometimes being so lonely, she'd just take her accordion and sing every song in the book, you know, with her accordion. Yeah, because she was so lonely, far from home. Yeah, far from home, yeah. Yeah, wow. Yeah, so one thing I was so surprised, she has such a good memory, you know. She says she's that time, 83 or something like that. And she can call that person's name even back to 50 years ago. I was fascinated. So after that, I realized that God wanted me to bring her back to China.

10:44 because she told me China is my first love and China is also my last love. So I just really feel like I came here for a mission. I was chosen to prepare for her. So because of that, I had to leave the U .S. because I planned to live here for a long time. Then I tried to reapply my visa. Mark Bruce, who had to write a book for helping me to get a visa. Three times they denied. So I realized that God wanted me to go back to China. So I went back to China for two years, just major preparing for her return to China. outpouring, pouring out the Holy Spirit again. When 60 years ago, she's an intercessor, laid down, giving birth to China. 60 years later, and then God used her as like a spiritual mother, you know, to raise up all the children and anoint them to be Antonian maiden servant to do the harvest work. Yes, yes. So that's 2010. Sister Granshaw came to you all, you know, came to Beijing.

12:01 And then we had seven men who did this. 40 days fast. Wow. So I didn't know any of them. And it was God. That meeting, really, God brought together 300, you know, all the underground church leaders, the orphans, the saints, you know, come together. It was beautiful. Yeah, it was beautiful. She just preached about it. Oh, she was welcomed by the 100 underground church, you know, all the peasants. They brought a drum. And the. trumpet. So in those days, we haven't got that long trumpet, but they got that do, do, do, do, do, that kind of trumpet, you know, and they blow the trumpet and they beat the drum when the army arrived, they came in, that like lift up the gate of China in the capital city and welcome her because that was God, that really from God recognized who she is and she had, you know, poured her heart to. In the 1940s. Yeah, 1947. Yeah. So this is 60 years later. And yeah, so after Beijing, the convention, I remember everything she shared on the convention is the end time, open a book of end time. So remember she talked about the revelation, the four horses, you know, chapter six and the four horses. Even she said, and I

13:33 never... preached on the four horses in my life. It was like open the end time, the scroll. So after that, we brought her all the way to Inner Mongolia, after Beijing to Inner Mongolia. We went to Great War. Everything about taking the Chinese Christian to another level. And they united their heart through that end time handmaiden, the mother's heart. So until we went back to find her first mission, you know, in Alashan. Yes. Yeah, that little town when she started the Bible school for two years. And that was another miracle. And we tried to look for the school. We saw the school must not exist, you know, 60 years. And we have no any clue. Yeah, we just settled in the hotel. Then I have a picture Sister Granshaw showing me. And she was with the early church leader, the Bible school, the student. And she and her first husband, they were the only white people. So I have seen that picture. She brought that picture with her. She brought it with her? Yeah. Oh, wow. That's how I recognized. Yes. Yeah, that's quite amazing.

14:59 Then I and Peter in that morning when we settled down in the hotel, we said, Oh, Lord, direct us to find that Bible school and find that church. She only told us. She told me this is Pastor Gao because when she left Mingxie and she committed the Bible college to her student. pastor go. He become in charge. She's in charge. You know, all the missionary left because Sister Granshaw is the last missionary left. Yeah. So, she only know he didn't pastor go. So, we get on the text, text driver ask, where do you want to go? We said, oh, we'll take her to church. He said, oh, there's several, three self church, government church. Which one do you want to go? We just said, any church you lead us, you know. And, Then she drove us to one of the churches, and we knocked the door. The pastor came out. He said, who are you looking for? We said, Pastor Gao. He said, I am Pastor Gao. That was God.

16:04 God led you. She led us into his office, and I suddenly found the same picture Sister Granshaw brought. That picture is on his desk under the thick glass. Wow. Wow. It was almost like, wow, how much chance you got. We're just pointing that. We said, do you know that white lady? He said, yes, she's our teacher. Grand, she said, grand. She said, how is she? I haven't seen her for 60 years. And we said, she's here in this town, hotel. He almost jumped. He said, oh, take me, take me to see her. Yeah, we just said, we'll bring her to this place. We said, where's Bible school? He said, here, this is the Bible school.

16:59 So it was still operating as a church? Yes, still the Bible school. Wow. We said, wow. 60 years later, it's still running. Still Bible. Glory to God. Yeah, amazing. He said the communism has confiscated, but later on they returned to the church. Wow. So everything like restored. Glory to God. Wow. We said, oh, in the afternoon, something about like 3 o 'clock, we'll come to see you. He said, give me a time. I'm going to call all these students, all the pastors to come. There were about 20. Yeah, 20 of them came. Some of them had to take a bus for one or two hours.

17:42 And so, yeah, when they all stood in the yard, you know, when Sister Granshaw walked into it, me and went up to the, yeah, because they told me that they got a piano. Organ. Organ. Nobody can play. It was like broken. He said the government returned to them a few months ago. It was like 70 years old, you know. Yeah. They were given by the missionary from other countries. Yeah. But anyway, he said the grandchild had played this. teaching them how to sing songs. And yeah, she's a very good musician. So Tommy started playing the song, you know, with the organ. Wow.

18:31 So that moment, they just divide appointment and Sister Greenshaw came in and... I just remember the wind blowing. Everybody stood up. We were all in tears. We all cried, you know, just having visited after 60 years. And Sister Granshaw just asked how the students, my students, are they alive? They said no one is missing, no one died, no one was killed. They are all alive. They all did a great mission work, you know. different area, region. And I said, ask this pastor, how many church did you plant? He said, oh, several hundred. And how many people you minister in this area? Oh, he said 60 ,000. Yeah. 60 ,000?

19:22 Yeah. In whole province, you know. Wow. He's become like reverend, you know, the leading all this. They still sing the old hymn because they sing the old song. I know that. Mr. Simpson. What is it? Oh, W .W. Simpson. Yeah, W .W. Simpson. The songbook he wrote for them. Yeah, I read it. I was crying, he said, because in the book it says, Ask the Lord, harvest 44 ,000 Chinese, or 44 million Chinese. In those days, back to 1920, 44 million Chinese. And crying. Wow, we just said that. It was really amazing. They're still seeing his hands. Wow. Wow. Then they have so much report. Then I remember Sister Gwen just sitting there. Fruit after fruit, fruit after fruit. Beautiful. Yeah, so that trip is like such a fulfillment. She felt the joy. That's why when she returned, she felt like my mission had completed. What did they call that? Your swan song? Swan song. Swan song. Yeah, her swan song tour. That's what she called it. Called it. So she started in China, and that was her last overseas trip, I think. Yeah, that was it.

20:49 It was right after that, after she got home, she started going downhill. Yeah, yeah. We met so many Chinese people. They all said, oh, we're the end -time handmaidens. We have joined the Beijing conference, joined the Xi 'an conference. We're all end -time handmaidens. Remember once you anointed 500 end -time handmaidens? And a peasant, you know. Yes. Wow. After 10 years of visiting them, how you say, we're Anton's handmaidens. Wow. We want to hear from Mama Grange Shaw. We want to, yeah, to know where should we go, you know. Wow. Yeah, they're very faithful, dedicated.

21:32 God, you know, using them as a harvest since 2010. They all become deeper. to censor warrior and evangelist planting church all over China. Glory to God. Oh, many of them be said to the other nation, you know, like Brother Xiang who has a... According to our whole group, because he's the one pouring out so much finance, you know, for almost, he give out all his saving money, everything. Yeah, for that trip. And, you know, he wanted you guys stay in the five -star hotel. He said, we want to honor Mama Grandshaw.

22:13 We want to give her all the best, you know, so. They paid, oh, yes, thousands, thousands, thousands on that journey. So, but they, God reward them so much. Yeah. So now they, God sent them to all the Afghanistan, all the Muslim country. Actually, God give the Muslim country to them. They are also very faithful and time servant. They are in the harvest field for, yeah, those country. Other people cannot. God gives them the permission, authority, anointing. Yeah, wow.

22:54 That's amazing. That's amazing. They can go where we can't. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, glory to God. That's fantastic. Yeah, God will connect us again one day. Yeah. And we'll, I mean, whether it's on this planet or when we get to heaven. What about the churches we were at, the orphanages? That was in 2012. Anhui province. Anhui province. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's another fantastic story. Remember that the orphan in, yeah, we raised up almost over 100 orphans. And the one -child policy created so many homeless children, abandoned baby. Yeah. Yeah. So the three families, three pastors, they pick up their children from the street, from the rubbish bin. Or some people brought that baby to that door. It's really, you know, heartbreaking story. Especially special needs children and girls. Yeah, and the girls.

23:53 And also someone has, you know, the paralyzed, yeah, and the sickness, you know. Yeah, the parents can't afford having that sick baby. Right. So they can't send to anybody else. Nobody wanted. So they put it at the door past the jail. He's the one. He raised up. He probably received a hundred of them, even by himself. Some of them died. Part of the reason I came to the U .S. is because God rescued my son, Moses, because Moses was also the second child. We were not allowed to have him in China. So that's where God opened the miracle gate in 2001. I escaped from China and went to New Zealand. for rescue Moses' life. That's why God gave him the name Moses. So because of that, God gave me a burden, a heart to rescue. He said, I rescued your child.

24:52 Now you can rescue many Chinese children. Oh, beautiful. Yeah, I started that ministry right at the start of 2003. I met the three pastors, and actually we were having an underground church gathering, leadership gathering. Yeah, I saw some of the elderly men. like a 60 -year -old, hold a five -year -old girl. I said, your granddaughter? No, no, my daughter. I said, how did it come? He said, oh, I picked her up from the street. Abandoned baby, I raised him. Then the next day, they show me the baby lying at the city gate, at the city council's gate. That baby lying on the ground. That's making me heartbroken, you know. Sure. Some of the baby, maybe somebody pick up. Some of the baby, if not good, they just gradually died on the ground. So that night I said. I cry out. I call the pastor. We need to pick up all the children. You know, we need to. Then three pastors respond. Pastor Gal, Pastor Joe. Yeah, and two Pastor Joe. The other Pastor Joe is not a pastor. He just retired. He said, I'm retired. Now my brother is a pastor. I'm ignorant. I don't know how to preach. But God said, look after my little one. So that's his start of nature. He's raising up about 70. Wow.

26:25 Yeah. So God gives them different. So the pastor Zhao, the first one, he got the most difficult children, all the babies, the handicapped, the paralyzed, you know, because my heart was so burning. This baby need to go to hospital. And each baby needed 10 ,000 yuan to be received for the treatment. 10 ,000 yuan. Yeah, 10 ,000 yuan. What is that in American money? 1 ,300 U .S. dollars. 1 ,300 U .S. dollars just to be able to get the child into the hospital. Yeah.

27:16 Oh, those days in 2000, it's very evil, very cruel. They seen the pastor like begging them, kneeling on the floor, please rescue this baby. He said, it's none of your business. You should keep our government policy, you know. Oh, wow. You can't receive that baby. It's not yours. You don't have permission. Yeah, this kind of, you know, people are so deceived. Their hearts are cold. They don't have Jesus. That's the problem. That's right. The reason I tried to raise up funding in New Zealand, very difficult, you know. So that's part of the reason I began to understand why God brought me to U .S. and to Midland Odessa.

28:01 Because Midland Odessa has lots of wealthy people. They support the charity. Their company has their own charity company. So I started recruiting the right people to support. The orphanage. So, yeah, very thankful for American people. And the part, Sister Granshaw had also helping me. Remember, she went to Odessa, Midland, just majored for raising up funds for the orphanage. I remember that. Yeah. So after this, how many years, 15 years later, or during that time, we just, you know, sent missionaries from America, from New Zealand, go to take care of all these orphans.

28:45 We hold summer camps every year, baptize all their children. Eventually, more than 100 children survived, and some died, you know. Some of them, just government robbed them. Yeah, stealing them. Because the three orphanages are illegal. Yeah, government has done. So the government has some orphanages, right? Oh, yeah, government has orphanages, but it's like communism, you know. Yeah, totally. So these illegal orphanages were teaching the children about Jesus. I remember their faces being so. Sweet and glowing with the joy of the Lord. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because they're growing up with Jesus in every orphanage and the pastor, the father, they call them, the papa teaching mama, teaching them Jesus and the praying. Yeah, there's so much miracle in the orphanage during that group because they have to hide, you know.

29:42 Yeah, they're very... living like underground totally. But they kind of tell people we have a need, you know, that's right. They keep everything quiet. So that's why they're just training that faith. They pray. He says sometimes people throw a bag of flour, you know, to the wall. That's kind of, yeah, then sometimes they hunger, they just fast. Yeah, so nowadays, last year we went to See, one of the orphanages, yeah, Papa Zhao, he's already 83 years old now. He still has two young orphans, and they are like 13, 14, because they pick them up. One pick up from rubbish bin, another pick up from the toilet. Yeah, so they're too young. But all the other children, half of the children came back home because he said, Oh, Auntie, come back to us. I haven't seen them for years. So they all tried, you know, some take a train for 20 hours, 30 hours. They come to see me. I was just so amazed. All these young children, they still love Jesus, still have that shining, kind face. Beautiful. They do everything, you know. Very humble. They're doing very well whenever they're doing the work. The boss gives them a high praise. And a lot of them are already

31:13 married and have children. So every year they come home for a reunion. They still regard Papa Joe's house as their home. Every Chinese New Year they come home. They bought so many stuff. He had chicken. sheep and the clothes. He said, before, you know, the papa and mama tried very hard to buy clothes for them. So now, he said, children brought so many clothes for us. We're too old. We don't need the clothes, but they still buy for us. Yeah, we had a wonderful gathering.

31:54 Wow. Praise the Lord. God is faithful. Well, thank God. Thank God. Yeah, he's so faithful. His father was an orphan. Yes. Absolutely. Absolutely. So tell us just a little bit about how you and Lois grew up. Oh, yeah. You were in a communist nation, and your father was in the military, wasn't he? Yeah, that's right. Yeah, we grew up in the Mongolia Gobi Desert. And Mawusu is half desert, half grassland. And my father served in the Mongolia horse troop. And he's like a commander, yeah, colonel, something like that.

32:39 And my mom is a nurse. So when I was born, the year of the Cultural Revolution just about started. Oh, wow. Yeah, so they were too busy to look after. They had no time to take care of children. So they said all the children, I was the first born. And to where my grandmother lived. So my grandmother lived in the rural desert, you know. We like 10 miles away see one house. Yeah, muddy house. We live in the mud. Everything made by mud. Mud bed, you know. Wow. Yeah. So we grew up in a very isolated desert. You didn't know Jesus at all. No, no. Yeah. No exposure. Yeah.

33:27 But God is there. Yes, he's always there. He knows me. So he actually, God raised us up. So he gave us. pure environment. And we don't have TV. We grew up, we don't have any kind of the worldly thing. Everything handmade. So my grandparents teach us how to work. Yeah. Four years old, start working the farm because they have sheep, horse, and cow, and chicken, and all the animal. And it doesn't, like Israel, they seldom rain. So we have to carry the water from the well to...

34:08 water the crop and for the animals food you know even for our food our food is totally from the field we planted in the winter autumn we need to learn how to store and the food and underground so very self -sufficient you know and we wear the clothes that all my grandparents made for us My grandparents, in the night, they were knitting, keeping knitting the sweater, the thing, because in the winter, it's so cold, minus 40 degrees. Oh, that's very cold. And the Siberian wind blowing.

34:48 In the winter, you're almost impossible to go outside. The wind can, the sand. In the winter, we have to overcome the coldness, you know, by putting on so many sheepskin. The cotton clothes and the sheep skin, everybody look like a sheep. So that's how we hardly, you know, have a bath or shower, nothing. Only in the spring, summertime come, we love to have a wash in the hot, hot summertime, you know. But because we live in the desert, the desert is quite clean, you know.

35:29 Living in the desert, Dry, dry area. Yeah, very dry, our skin very dry, yeah. So, yeah, we learned how to, you know, milk the cows and dig in. We always teaching us to do double job. You know, for example, like five, six years old, the grandparents said you to be the shepherd boy, shepherd girl, you know, to look after the sheep and look after the cow. Another way, everybody carried a basket. You need to dig out the weed for the pig. In the sunset, we came home, we ride on the cows and carried a heavy basket of the pig food. Wow.

36:12 So that's kind of like my sister, she's eight years old, carry the bucket of water, you know. That's why she always complains that I didn't grow tall because I always carry the heavy water on my shoulder. Yeah, my grandmother has, you know, the tiny feet. Oh, she had bound feet? Yeah, bound feet. Oh, she's poor, my grandmother. Every night she has to... Unwrap, you know, so painful, you know. In the daytime, she almost kneel on the floor to work, you know. Day and night. Yeah, but we feel the tremendous love from my grandparents, you know. We learn so much from them. My grandparents all have very righteous character, you know. Yeah. Yeah, diligent, righteous, and generous. Our home is open for every stranger.

37:08 Wow. You know, we welcome anybody. they come home, they always have hot tea. We even have just one room, one mud bed, you know, like half of this room. So everybody has a corner, you know, sleep put on your, you know, the wool carpet. Mm -hmm. So everybody had the wool carpet you rolled up in the daytime. Oh, yeah. In the night, you lay down. So that keep you warm. Wow. Yeah. So the one by one, everybody, oh, even we got a stranger come, they had a room to sleep. Wow. That kind of life. That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah, so. After my childhood, until up to nine years old, and I went, we all returned to a military camp. So we live in the military camp. That is another community life. So we always grew up in the community, and the child in the community.

38:11 Then in the military camp, we like a hundred people living together in the camp, you know, all the officers, the soldiers, and the families. have a meal together, you know, yeah, many times we share the big meal, you know, or like kibbutz, you know, the way. So we share everything equally. Like children in the summer, we go to our military garden, you know, they plant so much vegetable. So our job is to gather that vegetable and then put it into the basket and put it at everybody's door. So then it has to be the same amount. So you're sharing everything. Yeah, yeah, we share everything. A little bit of, you know, molding our character. Sure. Yeah, generously share with others. The only problem with communism is that they've left out Jesus. They've left out God.

39:07 Yeah, yeah. Because communism itself is very much like the book of Acts where you share everything. Yeah, you share everything. But you've got to have the Holy Spirit. Otherwise, it doesn't work. Yeah. Otherwise, what's yours is mine. And what's mine is mine. Yeah, exactly. But in those days, they work out. I think God working because the principle about very sacrificial teaching, all of us live a sacrificial life. Yeah, because those soldiers, you know, who died for liberation of the communism, you know, before the Chinese people live such a terrible life. Those soldiers died for us. So the people have that kind of dying for one another, you know. Yeah. So yeah, much, much less. less of a selfishness than today.

39:55 You know, in those days, we always think about others. We want others best, you know. Yeah, so when coming to, then suddenly China changed. Yeah, before China emphasized on labor education, cultural revolution is everything about labor education, you know, all the intellectual growing pride. So they've been sent to the country to do the labor job. So the peasant is like, best. If you are peasant, you're the highest position in China. Wow. Yeah. If you have money, wow, you look down upon. So everybody very proud of I'm a poor or I'm a... Wow. Yeah. So because our family come from peasant, you know, situation.

40:42 So my father, that's why he has been promoted. Because my father also very great character, you know, leading by integrity. So he was promoted. And all these officers in the military camp are very good character. They like a Christian or more than, you know, they self, they set up very good example for all of us, you know, always. working for others. So anyway, we started school, and China's education changed from a laboring education to intellectual education, so intellectual type. So everybody needs to study very hard.

41:23 So we all study very, very hard because we're always very obedient, you know, like best children or best students. So we always want to do the best. You know, that's from our parents, grandparents. So I become like a top student in all my school, primary school, intermediate, high school. So eventually I went to the top law university in China. Law? Yeah, law. Oh, I don't think I knew that. That university is training for government official, you know. Okay. Yeah, and to making the law or serving the law and to training to be a judge or lawyer. very high position. So this is a chosen, you know, maybe one among thousand students you've been chosen. So I was chosen, you know, and to serve the communism law, you know, serve our government, you know. Yeah. And she passed the high examination. She was the first master degree graduate from the banking because that time China started economic, you know, Deng Xiaoping time in 1980, especially.

42:33 you know, when relationship between America and China restored, that like a business started, you know, economic time. So he was, she was the first graduate or master degree student from her banking. 一样的 ,我的本科和研究生专业是一样的。 Yeah ,就是banking嘛, yeah. So, yeah, but when I... achieved that level, but I suddenly feel when I was at university, I lost my goal. I don't know what is next for me to achieve. And also, I'm tired of driving myself so hard. You know, I suddenly feel I'm seeking for the meaning of my life. Yeah. Why I'm on the earth. Why if I'm living just for working, it's like those days Chinese people had to work always Chinese people. But they don't have happiness, don't have joy. Yeah. Yeah. Just like sleep, you know. Yeah. So I started searching the meaning of the life. I went to all the library and study. And part of the reason I study English, I want to go overseas. So I chose two. I did a double bachelor, one the law, one the English.

43:49 I want to go overseas. I want to search in the truth, go to the Western country. You know, that's my goal. And when I was so lost, I just so depressed because one day, one of my friend, classmate, she committed suicide. And she threw herself from 13 high building. I cried. I feel like I want to follow her. You know, I feel so meaningless, you know. Oh, just like a book of Ecclesiastes, you know. Empty, empty, empty, empty. Right. Yeah. Then God know. And then one day that would, yeah. That time already we got, I only very interested in learning English and also communicate with my English teacher. So one day we got an English teacher. She's a different English teacher. When she walk into the room, I saw her face gloomy with the light. I didn't know what that. Then she smiled like angel. Then I realized every...

44:55 Teacher different, she's always teaching us with a smile on her face. She's so happy. I just want to know why she's so happy. Then I become very close to her, and then she brought me to government church. Before that, I don't know any church. I don't know Bible. I don't know Jesus at all. Never heard about it. So when I remember when I walk into the Three -Self Church, it was singing, What a good friend of Jesus. Wow, that choir singing. You know what? Tears pouring out like rain. I cried for, non -stop crying for three days. I believe that's born again, you know.

45:43 I just, everywhere I go, I cried. I just saw the beautiful flower, everything beautiful, you know. That's such a born -again spirit. I never forgot. So, yeah, so immediately after I have it. great passion want to learn bible so god brought so many american missionary to me to teach me bible german missionary australian missionary anyway i don't know how they just come to my life suddenly like yeah and my life I found a meaning. I found a joy. I began to laugh like them, you know. Tremendous change. Then I received, at the same time that God, Jesus, given me a calling, I read all these early disciples. Jesus said, come follow me. I'll make you fishmen.

46:35 I just cannot help denying it. I said, Jesus, you call me to be a fishman? You call me to follow you? And eventually. When I graduated in 1987, or 88, I graduated from my double major, and I have opportunity to remain at my university to become a law teacher. Yeah, so teaching the law in English, that kind of position they give to me, and you can have a good salary, you can have a... Beijing citizenship, you know, it's very hard to get Beijing citizenship like get a Roman citizenship, you know. The highest citizenship in China. But I just keep feeling like God calling me and God brought me to underground church.

47:27 All these saints, you know, they just come out of the prison, you know. Wang Mingdao's disciples, they... They've been in prison 20 years. So they've just been released. I was, you know, by accident, I was brought to their meeting. It's like, wow, you know, later I realized they are like passing on their anointing to us, you know, like mental, they mentally are. So I just cannot deny God calling me to serve him. Give up everything, you know. Jesus keeps saying, you know, and deny yourself, take up your cross to follow me. pay the price. So I decided to give up my job, give up my career to follow Jesus. But I didn't realize that cost me so much. I got no job, no place to stay. I just want to go to Bible college.

48:26 But for going to Bible college, I have to... live in nowhere, had no money, nothing for four or five years. But God said, I am your Bible college. He started training me and using me as evangelist. So that time I got such a zeal to preach gospel. I preached and built up the university fellowship, the first fellowship in university. Wow. Yeah, later I went back to my school, my university. They have so many become Christian. Glory to God. Yeah, even today they still, the fellowship become a church, underground church. Wow. So, Annie, I want to say thank you for sharing this part of your story with us.

49:13 And we're going to continue in the next episode sharing with your sister's story. Lois has such an amazing story about being in prison in China. If you enjoyed today's podcast. Please subscribe, rate and review this podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts. Your review helps the podcasting platform suggest this podcast to other listeners who are also looking for a great move of the Holy Spirit. Check out our website at globaloutpouring .org to find out more information, read our blogs, connect with us and donate. You can also browse our web store for life -changing anointed books. Until next time, this is Sharon Buss. And I'm Philip Buss.

50:03 God bless you with his overwhelming loving presence.